Tag: patience

Posted on in Gratitude, Miscellaneous, Perseverance

Collision Course

Yesterday, I had a few minutes before work, so I went to get the mail that I missed the day before. On my way back inside, I looked up at the sky and noticed two airplanes. From my perspective, they were only an inch or so apart. 🙂

In fact, based on their trails, they looked like they could collide. Though I knew they wouldn’t. The air traffic controllers would have them on separate paths at different elevations. Safety first!

I tried to take a picture, but they were gone by the time I came back outside. I could only see part of the trail from one airplane. It’s crazy how fast they moved apart!

Free Plane Aircraft photo and picture

But, then that got me thinking… we are all on our own course, but God makes sure we get where we are going. Your destination might be work or school today, or maybe the grocery store. But, for those of us who know Jesus, our final stop is Heaven.

I also thought about how there are people on the journey with us, such as family, friends, and coworkers. At times, our paths collide and we go together, and occasionally our paths diverge. But, in both cases, we can trust God to lead us.

Finally, I was thankful for all the ways God keeps us safe, even when we can’t see the danger around us. We face many possible “collisions” (or challenges) in a day, but God watches out for us. We typically have all potential problems on our radar, but He does.

Occasionally, we see life from a different angle and get a glimpse of who God is or what He is doing. It’s like we are on a collision course with God’s grace! He won’t let us get too far from His love!

In those moments, let’s praise Him for carrying us, protecting us, and providing for us. Let’s encourage those who are on the same path (or plane) as us, too!

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God, thanks for taking good care of us and navigating our path. Help us trust You along the way. In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Question: When you see airplanes, do you ever imagine where they are going or think about the lives on board?

Task: Next time you see an airplane, briefly watch its trail… from where it has come and consider the trajectory. Remember, each person and plane is important to God!

Posted on in Finding Grace Weekly Recap, Food and Nutrition, Gratitude, Miscellaneous, Parenting

Finding Grace #390

You may have seen the acronym GRACE as God’s Riches At Christ’s Expense. Grace is also God’s unmerited favor, or God doing for us what we cannot.

I find grace overflowing with God’s love, joy, peace, blessings, mercy, power, provision, protection, and wisdom. Thank You, Jesus!

Free Dahlia Flower photo and picture

Where did I find God’s love and favor—His abundant grace—this week?!

This week was a little hectic but good! Lydia and I had several events that took planning ahead and felt ‘big.’ I had to keep praying, working hard, and trusting God. I also took several deeeeep breaths. But, it all turned out really well.

 On Sunday, we volunteered at church in the morning (greeting at the kids ministry) and in the evening (an outdoor women’s event). We had good food and saw some friends. I thought I would be really tired after a full day of serving, but I was actually energized!

On Monday, Lydia babysat for a little baby all on her own. She is very responsible and good with little ones, but I was a little nervous anyway since we had not previously met him. Lydia had a blast and entertained him for two hours. She even earned a few bucks!

Lydia started middle school this week! She had fun and already has three favorite teachers, so I think that’s a good sign! We are excited for this next season.

Work was good but fairly busy and full of problem-solving. Nearly all of my patients came this week, but it made me happy to be using so many of my skills. I also had fun attending a yoga session with my coworkers on our lunch break! Then, I worked a couple extra hours on Friday and also went in today for two hours (my on-call weekend). Whew!

My mother-in-law came to visit this week, as she sometimes does when I am on-call. She took Lydia shopping, and then I joined them for a few other activities. We always have fun together and have some more things planned for tomorrow!

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These are only a few examples, but God’s grace never runs out!

There’s grace in every situation—we just need to look for it. God promises if we seek Him, we will find Him (see Jeremiah 29:13)!

Posted on in Gratitude, Life is Short, Miscellaneous, Perseverance, Pivot, Wisdom, Worship

Rush Hour

Rush hour in Fargo is, well, nothing compared to say Chicago or Minneapolis! In the big cities, you could be in traffic for over an hour and barely move. I don’t think I could handle that on a regular basis!

In contrast, you may drive for fifteen to twenty minutes in Fargom yet typically keep moving along. But you still need patience, especially when people try to rush ahead or cut in traffic on the highway.

Yesterday, I spent some time running errands after work. I decided to skip the busier route and went through town. I still hit some traffic, though not as many vehicles switching from one lane to the other. Funny how the other lane always seems to move faster!

I am just as guilty as others trying to get home after a long day or move on to the next activity. But yesterday, I just took it easy and enjoyed the ride. Even so, I was home within eleven minutes after finishing my errands.

Free Traffic Cars photo and picture

I thought about how a spiritual “rush hour” might go. Now, often, God’s timing is much slower than ours. He is never early, never late, and always right on time!

Second Peter 3:8 says, “But do not forget this one thing, dear friends: With the Lord a day is like a thousand years, and a thousand years are like a day.” God’s timing is unique, but so are His purposes for us.

So as I sat in traffic and watched other people, I wondered how often I rush to move closer to God or hurry up my routine to spend time with Him. I don’t usually have a lot of wiggle room, so I have to set aside time diligently and even invite Jesus to come with me.

Do I speed up and ‘switch lanes’ to get to Him?

Do I readjust my schedule and rush to Him, or do I rush through my time with Him to move on to the rest of my day?

Every day is a little different, with a morning and evening rush (traffic, and often at home). But ideally, we should be excited to spend as much time with the Lord as possible. I am challenged to rethink my daily routine, and I hope you are, too!

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Heavenly Father, thanks for these little insights into the spiritual world. Help us throw off everything that entangles us so we can run toward You.  Help us keep You as our main priority. In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Questions: How can you focus on God in your travel time? Do you like to sing and worship God; pray for your day or others; or listen to a podcast or audiobook about spiritual matters?

Tasks: Listen to God’s word through the YouVersion Bible app. Or, tune your car radio to KLOVE or your local Christian radio station (in Fargo, that’s Life 97.9 FM). If you have SiriusXM, check out The Message. Several of these have phone apps, as well!

 

Posted on in Being Gracious, Gratitude, Kindness, Miscellaneous, Perseverance, Personality, Wisdom

Closer

I overheard some really joyful news this week about a not-so-close-friend. I really like her, but, I am not sure I will reach out. We haven’t seen each other in a couple of years, and I don’t know how she would respond. I assume if she wanted me to know, it would be clear. I’m sure she will make an official announcement when she’s ready.

We have never been ‘super’ close; we just had a few good times together. For now, I will pray for her and cheer her on behind the scenes. And, if I get the chance, I will tell her how happy I am for her.

Do you have friends like that? Or maybe the term really should be acquaintances. 🙂

Indeed, many people are in my not-too-close category. It’s not that we don’t connect; people consistently tell me I am friendly and approachable. I am compassionate and good at listening. When asked for help, I always provide a basic plan to follow. But, then the problem is solved, and they tend to move on.

Free Flowers Siberian Bugloss photo and picture

So, I don’t know if it is me or them, or both! It certainly could just be a bunch of random circumstances not worth mulling over. Yet, here we are. 😉

When it comes to relationships, we’ve all heard something to the effect that if they talk about other people with you, they will talk about you with other people. But, I avoid gossip because so many people trust me to keep their confidence and I take that seriously.

I’m also fairly low-key. No drama here… but that also makes me one of the last to know!

Similarly, I use caution (wisdom!) when opening up to people. I’m fairly good at reading people and know not to misplace my trust. (#boundaries) I am okay with having a few solid friends who ‘get me’ rather than many loose acquaintances. It is important to know who’s in your corner.

Free Forget-Me-Nots Flowers photo and picture

Randomly, I think, “Hmm, maybe I’m just not that memorable, or maybe I just don’t have anything exciting to offer.” Case in point: I am great at remembering names and personal details, but I often have to reintroduce myself to people… multiple times, which gets old. Thankfully, Jesus never forgets me – He knows me better than I do!

I suppose most of these thoughts reflect my introverted personality. I am quiet and appreciate solitude, but I’m not really shy. I shine in asking good questions, but people don’t often reciprocate. I’ve been told I’m ‘blendable’ and can relate to a wide variety of people and interests. While that may mean I get lost in a crowd, maybe I’m the gel that helps keep everything cohesive. I appreciate that about myself!

Building community can be an art. Though, I only have so much extra time and energy, and we are all going in different directions with various obligations. That’s not necessarily a bad thing, but it may preclude vulnerability.

Free Forget-Me-Nots Purple Flowers photo and picture

To clarify, having a lot of friends and acquaintances is a huge blessing. I have needed help from at least four friends this summer (Lydia, yardwork, questions, etc.). Yet, while my friends (and family) are sometimes unavailable, Jesus is always there for me.

Despite my occasional self-doubt, I understand it’s not ‘all about me.’ I am an Ambassador for Christ, so I am happy to share anything personal to help someone grow closer to Jesus for Eternity. It could be embarrassing, but as long as it is useful, I don’t mind! If that brings awkward conversations, so be it!

Ultimately, our contact list, Facebook likes, birthday shoutouts, or blog followers can only get us so far. They have a place, yes, but they don’t measure our true worth. Afterall, we don’t have to be popular, but we do need to live purposefully.

So, let’s draw closer to Jesus every day. He always welcomes us in and is eager to chat, no matter how much time may have passed!

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God, thanks for Your Friendship! You never let me go! Help me be a good friend, and help me keep drawing closer to You. In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Questions: Did you know there are more than seventy varieties of forget-me-nots? How do you invest in your friendships?

Task: Make a list of your best qualities and how they apply to friendship. When it feels like people have abandoned you, pull out the list and pray about your next steps. (Don’t sell yourself short. Not all relationships are intended to last forever, and that’s okay!)

Posted on in Being Gracious, Food and Nutrition, Journey of Grace, Kindness, Life is Short, Miscellaneous, Perseverance, Wisdom

The Battle Belongs to the Lord

The last two days, work has been a little hectic. Not bad, just busy.

I already had a full schedule without much time in between patients. And then, I had some unexpected phone calls to return. Phone calls are normal, but these were a little more involved and time-consuming.

I ‘inherited’ a complex patient with many medical problems. I was assigned to take over after they made unfounded complaints about a very qualified coworker. Simply put, the patient’s family did not get the answers they wanted, and sadly, his prognosis is difficult to accept.

This patient requires a feeding tube, but it’s unusual due to how the tube was placed and medical complications (not related to his VA care). To start, the patient has cancer and is undergoing multiple treatments. But the bad news just keeps piling up.

In many ways,  it reminds me of Dave’s own cancer battle… and my emotional reactions. Unfortunately, this patient has even more medical issues, if you can imagine that.

Free Doctor Doctor'S Office photo and picture

So, while I am empathetic towards the patient, he has a lot of needs. I have years of experience to draw upon, but each situation is different. I have fought to get them what they need, but more than once, the family has put me on the spot. While I encourage advocacy for loved ones, I consistently do my best to provide the highest level of care.

In the past, with other patients, I occasionally have been yelled at when trying to get to the bottom of certain challenges. For instance, I won’t order something if it puts the patient at more risk. I wait until I have adequate justification, but patients sometimes argue and make their own decisions anyway (which is their right). While it doesn’t happen often, this week, I felt circumstances were going in that direction.

Even though the patient’s family had been friendly on the phone, they went to other sources to try and get what I wasn’t quite ready to provide. I was still gathering information and needed them to work with me, not against me. Nonetheless, it made me feel like they thought I wasn’t doing my job.

And reflecting on my own journey, I remembered my fight is not against other people (Ephesians 6:12). Still, I dreaded calling the patient again. 

Then yesterday morning, I was in my car getting ready to walk inside to my office. I was stalling by listening to the radio in my car. One of my favorite songs, “Battle Belongs,” by Phil Wickham, came on. (Sample lyrics below)

When all I see is the battle, You see my victory
When all I see is the mountain, You see a mountain moved
And as I walk through the shadow, Your love surrounds me
There’s nothing to fear now for I am safe with You
So when I fight, I’ll fight on my knees
With my hands lifted high
Oh God, the battle belongs to You
And every fear I lay at Your feet
I’ll sing through the night
Oh God, the battle belongs to You
And if You are for me, who can be against me? Yeah
For Jesus, there’s nothing impossible for You
When all I see are the ashes, You see the beauty
Thank You God
When all I see is a cross, God, You see the empty tomb
So when I fight, I’ll fight on my knees
With my hands lifted high
Oh God, the battle belongs to You
And every fear I lay at Your feet
I’ll sing through the night
Oh God, the battle belongs to You
Almighty fortress, You go before us
Nothing can stand against the power of our God
You shine in the shadow, You win every battle
Nothing can stand against the power of our God
Nurse placed adapter in equipment probe of enteral nutrition, palliative care in hospital, conceptual image, composition hotizontal Nurse placed adapter in equipment probe of enteral nutrition, palliative care in hospital, conceptual image, composition hotizontal enteral nutrition stock pictures, royalty-free photos & images

Singing along, I was gently reminded that not only is God for me, He is also for my patient and his family. Not only is He for us as people, but He is also 100% against cancer. God will always aim for a win-win, and only He has the power to do it time and again!

Yes, I remembered this battle belongs to the Lord. So, I decided to let God fight for me, knowing He is also fighting for my patient. I had a good brainstorming session with two of my coworkers, including the specialist on the case before me. I was still nervous to call, but when I did, a creative temporary solution had already been provided. They were going to try that, and I’ll check back with them later this week. 

It’s still a very tough trial, and short of a miracle, this patient will continue to decline. But, while it’s my job to care for him nutritionally, I also feel responsible to pray for his comfort, healing, and well-being. Similarly, I can respond with grace and compassion, since I know what it feels like when the tables are turned.

Ultimately, Jesus is our living hope. There is no need to fear. We can trust Him in all things because He has already won the war, and our Victory is in Him!

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God, You are so good. Thanks for taking good care of all my patients and me. Thanks for fighting our battles, Lord. Help us rely on You and share Your love with others. In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Questions: Have you ever been in a similar situation, where you are doing your best and people misjudge your effort (or you feel like they are)? How did you handle it?

Tasks: Remember that fear and dread are not from God. Put your trust in Jesus, and watch Him fight your battles.

 

Posted on in Being Gracious, Gratitude, Life is Short, Miscellaneous, Perseverance, Wisdom

Shine Bright

Yesterday was an interesting day at work! It started off fairly busy without much downtime. My morning flew by with charting and three hour-long patients. Then, two people canceled in the afternoon, giving me time to eat lunch and catch up on more charting before my final afternoon patient.

That’s all pretty standard. But then the power went out in my office and the one next door, where two of my coworkers sit. It was a utility failure! We could not get anything done in the pitch black… so we decided to take a quick walk outside and enjoy the bright sun. We decided to make the best of it!

By the time we came back, everything was up and running again. I thought I lost two of my notes, which were in progress, but thankfully, the computer saved them. I was glad I didn’t have to redo all my work!

An hour or so later, one of the managers walked by, warning us to save our work just in case. There was another (planned) power outage. Sure enough, a few minutes later, my screens went black again. I went to warm up my coffee, and by the time I returned, everything was back to normal.

I’m glad this didn’t happen when my patient was there. We had full power when she walked in a few minutes later!

Later, as I drank my coffee and charted on notes, I thought about ways to handle the unexpected things that pop up, such as challenges, failures, or inconveniences. God doesn’t expect us just to sit alone in the dark with a negative attitude. He wants to shine through us!

There are many ways to destress, such as talking with friends, taking a walk, making a warm drink, taking a nap, or journaling. Instead of being upset about all that’s wrong, we can be thankful for what’s going right.

But most of all, I am grateful for God’s presence and understanding. It’s good to pause and reconnect with God because He always meets us where we are! He graciously provides for all our needs.  

Regardless of the day’s adventures, we always have the opportunity to shine bright for Jesus!

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God, thanks for all the ways You help us! Thanks for helping us make the best of daily stresses. May we shine bright and bring honor to You! In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Questions: How has God shown up for you this week? Can you see His grace and provision?

Task: Reframe your next unexpected problem and see it through God’s lens.

 

Posted on in Gratitude, Life is Short, Miscellaneous, Parenting, Perseverance, Pivot, Prayer, Wisdom, Worship

On Summer Bucket Lists

Summer is always an exciting time of year. Typically, there are a lot of fun activities, people to see, and places to go. Summer weather sure makes it easier to get around. Small errands are quick and don’t take extra effort! Indeed, it is great not to have to bundle up in layers just to go outside! 

Sometimes, it’s difficult to figure out what to do and what to skip. We are more likely to try new things in summer because it feel more free. The daytime hours last longer, but if I am not careful, I could sign up for too much and miss all the wonderful surprises of the season.

It is wise to pray and ask for wisdom before we make our plans.

Free Sunflower Flower photo and picture

For my summer bucket list, I would like to take at least one little hike with Lydia and at least one early morning bike ride with her (before traffic gets crazy). I want to keep working on my yard and sit around a campfire with friends. I want to read some books and listen to my windchimes while sitting on the deck. Add a cup of coffee for the perfect Saturday morning… It’s good to find time to be still!

Lydia’s list is fairly short. She would like to go swimming and hang out with her friends.  She’s also excited to play volleyball and go to camp. Pretty simple.

Last night, I was reminded of a memory from ten years ago when I questioned God’s faithfulness. I angrily accused God of not doing His part to bring the spring. Yes, it had been a really long winter watching Dave decline… But then, in His own way and time, the Holy Spirit whispered to my heart, “I always bring the spring, and I bring the summer, too.”

Immediately, I understood that He had a good plan for me regardless of what happened. (And things certainly got worse!) But, over the years, I have found myself thinking about the summer metaphor, and just as I was writing this post, it hit me.

Maybe this is it.

Free Sunset Sun photo and picture

Lydia and I are not just having a great summer, we are in a place where we are thriving. We have found a good rhythm and are growing every day. We aren’t letting little setbacks become major. We are seeking God’s grace and finding it along the way. We are grateful.

That doesn’t mean everything is perfect. But, it is good. Summer is about a third over, but we don’t know how long the metaphorical summer will last. So, I better make the best of every season and trust God.

You might be going through something rough right now, and it’s hard to see the way forward, let alone think of a bucket list. I understand.

Draw near to God; lay your burdens at the feet of His throne. Rest in Him.

If you let Him, He will carry you to a good spot where you will thrive. He is faithful.

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God, thanks for the gift of summer. You have good plans for us, always. Help us make the most of our time in this beautiful season. In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Question: Do you have a summer bucket list? What are your top three items on the list?

Task: Make a list of all the things you would like to do. Road trips, concerts, camping, fishing, etc. Map out your summer because it will go fast!

 

Posted on in Miscellaneous, Perfectionism, Perseverance, Wisdom

Dandelions and Thistles

I have really enjoyed taking care of my yard this summer. It’s nice to be outside and physically active! I’d love to get some flowers and do more landscaping, but I don’t have that much time and energy! I could hire someone, but that gets expensive, especially when I don’t really have a plan in mind.

Besides, I have an ongoing problem.

Lots of hot sun + not a lot of water = dead patches.

I have a little green grass, a fair amount of dry thatch, and a variety of weeds. It’s all a little defeating sometimes because the thatch and weeds are so prevalent.

I actually don’t mind some weeds; right now, they are the greenest, prettiest portion of my yard! I do try to pull the thistle weeds because they hurt, but the occasional dandelion or creeping whatever-it-is-called doesn’t bother me.

Technically, dandelions are good and, perhaps, cheerful, though they may be unwanted. They are even edible, though I don’t think I’ve ever tried them. In other news, I am seriously thinking about planting micro clover! It is bee-friendly, hearty, and low maintenance. It might conserve the soil, too.

Free Dandelion Flower Dandelion Egret photo and picture

As I was pulling weeds recently, I was able to pray and contemplate. During these precious moments, I was reminded of weeds in the Bible.

In Matthew 13, Jesus taught several parables to explain spiritual issues. He used a lot of agrarian principles, such as sowing, reaping, and weeding.

In the first parable, Jesus talked about a sower who threw seeds onto the ground. They landed on 1) the path and were eaten by birds; 2) rocky ground without much soil, which caused the roots to scorch in the heat; 3) a patch with many weeds, where the seeds were choked out; and 4) good soil, which produced an abundant harvest many times over.

It seems the environment and soil has a lot to do with how well the seeds did. There are lots of other insights if I had more time to get into this. But, I’ll keep it simple today and point you to verses 18-23 linked above. Basically, we need to guard the seed, which is God’s Word, dig deeper, and remove distractions.

Later, in another example, Jesus said to leave the proverbial weeds because removing them would ruin the rest of the crop. He promised to take care of them once the Harvest is at hand.  Soon… come Lord Jesus, come!

Free Wildflower Meadow Flower photo and picture

What are the spiritual weeds in our lives? These could represent the concepts of good and evil, which still coexist in the world. But, personally, I’m considering distraction, social media, laziness, disobedience, fear, and more. They choke, entangle, and sap our strength. They hinder growth and may prevent maturity. They keep us from living a full life!

I suppose a lot of my problems would be solved if I would consistently water the grass that’s left. Perhaps it would even sprout in some new areas with some grass seed. Though, I am a little conflicted. Water is a precious resource and the vanity of the short growing season.

So, for now, I will just get the weeds I can and do my best. Unfortunately, they just spread continually. Perhaps more importantly, I’ll diligently remove spiritual weeds, as they also spread quickly. And perhaps I can keep researching that micro clover!

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God, thanks for being such a good Father. Thanks for tending to us and providing for us. Help us remove spiritual weeds from our lives. Give us wisdom as we grow and see You more. In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Questions: Do you enjoy yard work? Do you like vegetable or flower gardening? What spiritual weeds are you enabling in your life?

Task: Read Matthew 13 and meditate on it. Pray about any spiritual weeds in your life. You will need God’s strength and power to remove them for good!

Posted on in Gratitude, Life is Short, Miscellaneous, Parenting, Prayer, Wisdom, Worship

A Moment to Reconnect

As you may recall, recently, our pastor gave a couple of sermons on baptism. There are two kinds, one with water and one with the Holy Spirit. I won’t explain all the details now, but you can listen here.

After the first sermon, Lydia was inspired to be water baptized. The second sermon was preached on her baptism day, so we caught up later by listening online during our lunch this past Sunday at home (yes, a week later!). It was about having God’s power in us through the Holy Spirit.

While these are not new concepts for me, I am excited to see them through Lydia’s young eyes. She has a good level of understanding but also has interesting questions! It also helps me to think through and reconnect with the message of Christ when I am explaining it all to her. Thank You, Jesus!

Then, last night, I was going to ask Lydia about my blog post, knowing she sometimes has good insights to share. Sure enough! I didn’t realize it then, but I interrupted her time with God!

She kindly gave me the phrase, “Stay in the moment,” and went back to her quiet time. I searched my blog and found a couple of other posts in a similar vein, so decided to take her idea but add a twist based on what she was actually doing at that moment.

A few minutes later, Lydia reminded me that Pastor Dave said if we “only have ten minutes to pray, we should spend eight minutes worshiping God, and two minutes asking for what you need. And if you don’t get around to asking Him, don’t worry about it. He already knows!” Worship is vital.

It thrilled me that Lydia set herself a little timer as she reconnected with God! 🙂 I know He is even more pleased than me, but seeing her doing this on her own with Him is so cool!!

In addition, we have begun sharing personal insights from our daily time with God with each other. Each of us reads a passage (same or different), and then we discuss what we learned about God, Jesus, and/or the Holy Spirit; what we learned about ourselves; and what we will do to apply the information. Pretty basic, but it works for kids and adults alike!

I’m sure our routine will evolve over time, but it is fun to help Lydia discern God’s Truth and see her grow! As her mom, I am her first example of what it means to follow Jesus, and I take that seriously.

Free Praise Worship illustration and picture

To be clear, there is no particular amount of time we should worship God or pray. Some may only have ten minutes here and there, while others can set aside a bigger chunk of time. Either way, we can spend every moment of every day walking and talking with our Father God and Savior Jesus through the Holy Spirit in us! What a privilege!

The point is to simply come… as you are. Lay aside all pretense or need to be perfect. Be still and know that He is God. Open your heart and mind to Jesus.

Allow the Holy Spirit to direct you. Transformation only comes from spending time in the presence of God!

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Heavenly Father, thanks for Your grace and love! Thanks for the privilege of spending time with You. Please change us from the inside out as we reconnect with You. In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Questions: How do you like to connect or reconnect with God? Do you like reading the Bible, praying, singing, walking, drawing pictures, etc.?

Tasks: Come and sit in God’s presence today. How that looks for you will be unique. But remember, you don’t have to feel anything to be loved! You already are!

 

Posted on in Fear, Faith, and Moving Forward book, Gratitude, Miscellaneous, Personality, Wisdom

Mood Meter

Hello! How are you feeling today? Today, I want to tell you about a tool called an emotion wheel that can help you understand how you feel so you can decide what to do about it!

I first encountered it while writing my book, though it has existed for many years. It helped me describe my feelings about Dave’s sickness and death, not to mention my struggle with fear, faith, and moving forward.

The act of writing was rewarding but challenging, so I appreciated being able to point to an adjective and analyze my feelings, process my grief, and stick with my project. In short, this tool takes abstract concepts and makes them more concrete.

I recently came across the emotion wheel again, and it felt like God’s perfect timing, as next Monday is the tenth anniversary of Dave’s death.

Most emotion wheels will highlight the basic feelings of happiness/joy, sadness/grief, fear, anger, disgust, and surprise. As Lysa TerKeurst says, “Emotions are indicators, not dictators.” So, we can use them for insight, but they don’t run the show and should not predict how we act.

We must identify emotions to validate and resolve them before they spill over on others. Unchecked emotions can lead to assumptions and wreak havoc. If not now, later. Unresolved anger can lead to passive aggressiveness, jealousy, and revenge. Fear can yield playing it safe and missed opportunities. Grief, without an outlet, can stop someone from living fully.

There are several ways to use the emotion wheel. You can start in the middle and work your way out, or vice versa. Find words that resonate with you and see how they are related. Then, you can come up with the next steps to address them.

Not surprisingly, it is common to feel several emotions at any moment. We may be confused or conflicted, like we are literally all over the place internally. Many of us feel physical sensations, like headaches, gut issues, pain, etc. We also tend to misunderstand others’ emotions, taking things personally when we shouldn’t.

Here are a couple of examples that have stood out to me when I’ve used the wheel:

“Oh, I am feeling isolated, which is similar to being lonely and related to sadness. Hmmm… could it be another layer of grief?” I could take a walk, but maybe I need to call someone for support.

or

“I am feeling overwhelmed, which is next to anxiety, which is rooted in fear. Why am I feeling afraid?” I should read some Bible verses about fear and turn my worries over to God.

Another example is this: I had a fun day recently, laughing and receiving good news. As you can imagine, I was mostly feeling happy emotions. In some ways, reading the adjectives later helped me relish the joy all the more.

Interestingly, I rarely feel angry – I deal more with fear… while Lydia more easily identifies with anger – yet it comes and goes quickly! We both relate to happiness and sadness, but less often, disgust. It has been fun to see and hear her perspective, and I hope it is a way for us to continue communicating as she moves into middle school.

Another tool is a chart I found on Etsy. It came as a download or in the form of a pillowcase! It ranks feelings according to a spectrum of energy and positivity. Anger is an adverse reaction, and it uses a lot of emotional energy. The sad emotions are typically less positive and drain energy. Joy is positive and high energy, while calmness is positive and low energy.

This was insightful because I tend to feel lower energy levels, but now I wonder if it’s just my personality. As an introvert, I get excited sometimes, but overall, I enjoy calmness and a slower pace. In fact, this is a great strength, but the world moves more quickly. Thankfully, I am learning to interpret what’s going on a little better so I can plan ahead. If I have a big event ahead, I can pare down my schedule to conserve energy and implement some strategies for coping and recovery.

Of course, there is no right way or wrong way to feel. These are simply tools. Nonetheless, you can combine them with Scripture to tap into all God has for you!

While Satan wants us to stay stuck in our emotions, distracted and offended, Jesus wants us to live fully! (See John 10:10.) Instead of being ruled by our feelings, let’s use them to turn to God! Instead of running away from our emotions, let’s use them to run to God.

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God, thanks for giving us emotions to help us feel and understand Your goodness. Help us to honor You and manage them well. In Jesus’ Name, Amen
Questions: Do you notice how your emotions change throughout the day? How does that affect your energy? What is your natural response to your feelings?
Tasks: For a fun challenge, use an emotion wheel to track how you feel during the day. Note any themes, pray about resolving any negativity, and keep moving forward!