Never Stop Learning

Sometimes there are those moments where you realize, “God’s not done with me yet.” Perhaps you survived a life-threatening event, or perhaps it’s just that you have more to learn. I’m sure there are many instances in between these two examples!!

In my case, lately, I have been learning more about all sorts of topics. These include health, nutrition, cooking, and also God’s Word, the Bible. I have even been playing around with calligraphy, painting and photography, too… nothing to show, just learning more about them!

I have also seen little reminders that I need to be vigilant against fear. If you have read my book, you’ll know I handle this much better now. Nonetheless, fear is subtle and I have to constantly be on guard and ready to defeat lies with the Truth.

No worries! Choosing faith over fear is just part of the life to which God is calling us.

Math, Blackboard, Education, Classroom, Chalkboard

Case in point: Have you ever felt like a challenge you are facing is a “perfect storm” situation? Like the situation evolved so “only you” can make a difference, or the battle is yours to lose? Like the situation was designed according to your fears or the problems you face?

I understand, and I am thankful that God Himself helps us carry the burden. But maybe you could think about it this way: Perhaps the problem is tailored to your strengths, to show what you know, so you can become more of who God made you to be.

And, if God is for us, who can be against us (Romans 8:31)? Failure isn’t really final if we acquire knowledge and skill. So hang in there!

It seems God lets us walk through trials so He can test us. He sees our gut reactions and if we are relying on Him or ourselves. He “proves” our heart to see if it is still tender and obedient, malleable to His will.

Yes, God uses these challenges to stretch us and prepare us for greater things. And, you know what? He walks through them with us.

I believe we can learn from anyone in any circumstance, what to do or not to do. I often learn from Lydia! One day, she came to me and said, “Mom, did you know the word ‘realize’ is like ‘real eyes’? I loved that she came up with that fitting way of explaining it!

My interpretation of Lydia’s insight is this: When we see our circumstances through our real eyes, that is God’s perspective and Truth, we will realize just how much He loves us and cares for us. He’s not done with us yet!

Our Heavenly Father is our Teacher, Protector, and Provider. He is infinite so there is always something to learn! Every day, we have new opportunities to go deeper with Jesus!

**********

God, thanks for Your patience in teaching me. Help me rely on You in every circumstance. Help me grow and learn so I am not found lacking. In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Questions: What is God teaching you right now? What are you doing about that?

Task: Listen to the song, “God’s Not Done with You,” by Tauren Wells. Everyone learns at different paces, so what seems basic to you might seem life-changing for someone else. Maybe that you are struggling with someone else sailed through. Let’s bring encouragement and support!

Reflecting on Ruth

Recently I started another Journible! I went through the Gospel of John in 2018 and finished the book of Jude last month (a quick win because it’s only twenty-five verses)!

Next, I am going through Ruth! I just started this week, but already it has impacted me. If you have read my book, then you’ll know I pay extra attention to widows in the Bible. Ruth is not a new story to me, but I am learning new things as I write God’s word line by line!

In short, Ruth was an outsider and a foreigner. She left all she knew in the country of Moab to follow her mother-in-law back to Israel. She gleaned barley in a field to make ends meet. In time, Ruth met Boaz, and he became her kinsman-redeemer, marrying her.

Then, they had a baby, and eventually, Ruth became the great-grandmother of King David. All in all, the book of Ruth is a beautiful love story showing God’s faithfulness.

But, that’s not what caught my attention.

Jesus, God, Christ, Holy, Spirit, Ruth, Bible, Gospel

Instead, I quickly noticed how Ruth went against the grain. She moved toward God when most people at that time were doing their own thing and worshiping other gods (Judges 17:6). Yes, Israel was a mess!

Ruth wasn’t the only one, of course. Boaz and Naomi, among others, also followed Godly principles. Though, because Ruth was a foreigner (not a Jew), technically, God’s promises didn’t apply to her. She would have been considered a nobody by the rest of society.

Additionally, Ruth was grieving and suffered major losses. I can understand how she must’ve felt as she lost her husband, her status as a wife, her local support system, her home, and even her culture. She didn’t have much left.

Nonetheless, she bravely sought God above all else.

I appreciate her example!

When everyone was running away from what they knew was right, Ruth ran toward God. She trusted Him to provide for her and protect her. She was willing to work hard and make a fool of herself. Because of that, God honored her decisions.

We have similar choices to consider today.

Has God asked you to do something that seems like a stretch for you? He may be calling you to move forward in a new direction when everyone else is standing still. It may be scary, but don’t be afraid to stand out and take a chance. He’s got you covered.

I love how God used Ruth’s character to change the course of history. (Ruth is in the bloodline of Jesus (Matthew 1:5!!) She could have stayed down and out, disqualifying herself or discounting her skills and purpose. Instead, she chased after the only One who could make it right. 

Let’s be like Ruth and pursue God, not for what He can do for us, but for Who He is. Soak up His grace, mercy, and love. Then, out of that abundance, let’s watch Him move on our behalf!

Today, remember God sees you and knows the challenges you face. Your situation is not a surprise to Him. He has not left you all alone or without help. Trust Him and do the difficult thing!

**********

God, You are so kind and generous! Thanks for Your grace, mercy, and love. Help us shake off all our doubts and come to You wholeheartedly. In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Questions: Did you know Boaz’s mother was Rahab, the former prostitute from Jericho? They also were ancestors of Jesus… so don’t you think He can use you, too?

Tasks: Check out the Journible website and join me! Remember, no one is too far gone to be used by God. He can use anyone who is willing to follow after Him!

Fear, Faith, and Moving Forward Book!!

Surprise!! It’s finally time for my big announcement, and I am so excited!

My book, Fear, Faith, and Moving Forward, is available for purchase! The book captures a two-year period of dealing with (my late husband) Dave’s cancer and my subsequent grief. At times, I didn’t know how I would make it.

During a time filled with chemo and chaos, I nearly walked away from my faith. But, God proved Himself over and over again. Despite my doubts, He came through for us!

Yes, it is a sad story at times, but I wanted to chronicle what happened for Lydia and inspire others. We all go through rough times on this side of Heaven, and it helps knowing someone understands. All hope is not lost!

Currently, your best way to buy Fear, Faith, and Moving Forward is to order through Barnes and Noble. I spent countless hours at our local B&N bookstore writing and editing with my laptop and a cup of coffee. So, it feels incredible to see my book online!

Announcing my book TODAY is significant for several reasons.

First, Lydia’s tenth birthday is coming up, and I wanted to beat that milestone. So much happened in the first two-and-a-half years of her life, and it just seems right to keep this project contained to her first decade. That way, we can officially close that chapter and keep moving forward.

Second, we are in the beginning stages of the holidays, and I want my book to be available before all the craziness starts. For some, it may be just what they need. That said, if a friend of yours is dealing with cancer, grief, or some other trauma, perhaps get your copy first and then consider how it may affect them. The book could certainly be helpful for your friend, but I would never want to add to their emotional turmoil. In that case, maybe filter out a few nuggets of truth for them until the timing is better.

My third reason is a little more personal. Today marks twenty-five years since my dear friend, Seth, died in an accident. (Part of me feels like it was just yesterday; it doesn’t seem I should be old enough to account for twenty-five years!) So, when I saw November 17th is today, a Wednesday, it felt like God’s timing. The book does not entail Seth’s tragedy, yet in my story, I mention how that loss helped me process Dave’s death. So, in my mind, they are somewhat connected.

The fourth reason is simply that there’s no time like the present. This project was complex and took me a while to finish. I had much to learn about writing and publishing a book. Grief and being a single mom were factors, not to mention work, household duties, and various levels of motivation. But, in the end, perfect conditions don’t exist. Something always comes up, and I am just going for it!

Finally, my fifth reason is that I need to continually challenge myself! It’s risky to put myself out there, but I don’t have to be afraid. I am covered with God’s grace. He goes ahead of me and He’s right beside me simultaneously. By faith, I need to release my book and step out of the way, so He can do what He does best.

In honor of my book launch, I created a new blog PAGE! I loaded it with some key details you might want to know before ordering.

Well, that’s it. I appreciate all your ongoing support, encouragement, and prayers!

**********

God, thanks for all the ways You have brought me through. You are so good and faithful. Would You please use my story to help others see You at work in theirs? May this book bring You glory. In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Questions: Any guesses on when I started writing my book?! Will you order the black and white version or the deluxe color version?

Tasks: Grab your copy of Fear, Faith, and Moving Forward today! Read more details here. I’d love for you to tag me on Facebook @GraceandLemonade or on Instagram @natalator with a picture of you and my book. Also, please share this post on social media. Goal: Tell at least 15 of your friends! 😉

Notice the Joy

It’s funny how seasons come and seasons go. Sometimes it seems nothing changes; but sometimes, it seems everything has changed! Often, we just take things for granted and we don’t see anything new. We fail to notice the joy that comes with those new seasons. But, God is always at work, and I believe He is always doing something new in our lives.

Over the last few months and even over just a few short weeks, I have noticed some new things in my life. Most of them are subtle, as new habits are forming. It is good to let go of what is not serving us well anymore. One small change can lead to the next!

Architecture, Skyscraper, Urban, City, Construction

First, my hair has grown a few inches, mostly because I just hadn’t taken time to get it cut. I was busy with work and school and so many other things! But after it grew past the awkward stages, I realized I enjoyed it. I still like it short and have recently gotten a trim, but now I can put it up in a longer ponytail which can be very helpful at times!

Indeed, my morning routine is a little quicker now because I don’t have to help my hair to go under! It takes less work, and I have a few extra minutes in the morning to work on little tasks around the house. A win-win as I embrace the natural outward flip at this length!

Oddly enough, my hair makes me look different in the mirror, but I have seen even more changes internally. Growing out my hair has given me a new perspective on who I am and what I like. It has made me rethink other changes I could make. Being open-minded has helped me see potential in other areas, too!

I am all about creating solid, sustainable habits, but change can be difficult for many of us. Yet, what if we just ease into something new or just try it for a week without a major commitment? What if we challenge ourselves to think differently and trust God for something greater?

Nothing is impossible for God, but often it seems we are holding something back. It could be related to fear, laziness, or just lack of enthusiasm. But remember, the first step is the hardest, and tiny steps in the right direction are still considered movement. Use joy as a motivator because there are built-in rewards that keep us moving forward.

So, another recent change is this: I have changed my morning commute. I was taking the highway, which may be slightly faster but is also more stressful at that hour. First, the morning sun shines in my eyes for several minutes. Second, I find myself subconsciously trying to beat other cars on the road. 🙂

It doesn’t necessarily involve speeding… But, if someone pulls in front of me or is going slower than I like, it irks me. Then, I am trying to get ahold of my attitude before walking into work. It is a small thing, but still a stressor I don’t need or want. So now, I take a parallel journey through town and look forward to the drive.

It has more stoplights, but there is less traffic and we naturally have to go slower. If I leave early enough, I hit mostly green lights, which really boosts my mood! The sun is not in my face as much, but I can still enjoy the fall colors and beautiful sunrises. In fact, I have found more joy in this new route because I feel calmer and can focus.

Yesterday morning, the sunrise was bright orange and purple!

Additionally, I have been parking in the overflow area across the street from work. That way, I always have a spot and don’t have to waste time circling around the usual lot. I also save time getting on the road after work because there are only a few cars leaving at any one time (instead of 50+ cars inching along in the other parking lot). Ironically, the highway is the faster, less stressful route on the way home. And, I have been picking up Lydia five minutes earlier, which feels great!

It does help that I have also switched to a backpack instead of a purse and a lunch box for work. I can walk a little more freely and the weight is carried over by my back rather than my arms and shoulders. Keeping everything in the backpack has also helped to relieve the stress of forgetting something because I can keep things in one place!

After this change, I have incorporated other ideas such as drinking tea at night. I am usually a ‘plain jane’ with tea. I don’t like a lot of flavored options or sweeteners, so lately, just decaf green tea or decaf black tea is fine with me. The joy comes through the process of making and drinking the tea. It is more ritualistic than coffee, which is my daily habit. Another bonus has been that if I am enjoying the tea, I don’t feel the need to have a late-night snack! So, my gut feels better too.

Drinking more tea has led to other changes, too. I have several great pieces of equipment that get regular use, but from one week to the next, I don’t always rotate through them all. In the last few weeks, I have been incorporating different activities into my exercise routine. This has helped me recover faster and avoid burnout while making my goals more achievable.

There are other habit changes I have made, but it’s fun to think they all started with NOT getting a haircut… Perhaps you have made small changes due to COVID or some other circumstances. Don’t give up if you don’t see progress right away! See all that can happen in just a few short months, and let that joy bring creativity and renewed purpose!

**********

Father God, thanks for helping me take small steps and celebrate small wins. Help me be obedient to all You are asking me to do. In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Questions: What is one small lifestyle change you can make this week? Does it scare you or do you feel confident?

Tasks: God gives us His power, as we change and become more like Jesus. If there is an area you are struggling in, ask Him to show you one small thing you can do differently. Then, watch it snowball and gain traction as you celebrate other wins! Check out this worship song: “New Thing” by Hillsong Young & Free

Be Bold, Be Brave

I have a friend who recently took a step back from what she was doing to go in a new direction. Society sometimes tells us what to do or not do, but I am proud of my friend for listening to her heart and following her dream.

God can do far more than we ask or imagine (Ephesians 3:20).

But still, it takes guts to go against the grain!

Lake, Mountains, Banff National Park, Islet, Bank

A blessing for her and for anyone who dares to trust God for greater things:

Be bold, be brave! Remember, God is with you and for you!

He is more than able to provide for you with the riches of His grace.

All good gifts come from God. He is the same yesterday, today, and forever.

Breakthrough is coming.

Following God’s plan is sometimes difficult… but it is always worth it.

Work as if it depends on You, and pray as if it depends on Him.

Then, receive what He has for you. He is faithful.

Breakthrough is coming.

Whatever happens, it has passed through God’s hands first.

No good thing will He withhold from those who walk uprightly.

What is for you… is for you. He will give you everything you need. Trust in Him.

Breakthrough is coming.

Don’t be afraid. Do the difficult thing.

God will help you through it and redeem any pain along the way.

Have courage and be willing to try something new.

Breakthrough is coming.

Lay aside your expectations and stand in faith, knowing God’s plan is best.

It may turn out different than you thought, but He will never let you down.

Rest in Him. Nothing is impossible for Him. He’s got this.

Breakthrough is here.

**********

God, You are King of our hearts and the God of breakthroughs. Nothing is impossible for You! Help us trust You for greater things. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.

Questions: Have you ever done something so big and life-changing that the only option was to trust God? Looking back, can you see His faithfulness?

Tasks: Print out this blessing and tape it to your mirror, or make your own!

Everybody In!

I was listening to the radio on my way to pick up Lydia from work yesterday. They were doing a fundraiser and someone offered to match the amount if others called in during the next song.

Astonishingly, NO ONE called in during the song. I don’t know if the person extended the offer or not, but I was thinking… what happens when no one responds in other areas?

The radio personalities explained that if we all think someone else will step up, then there’s a chance no one will. They gave several examples, such as when someone is stuck on the side of the road, or when there’s an emergency in a crowded area, or even how we all walk by the same mess without cleaning it up.

Somebody else will take care of it, right?

Interestingly, this situation is really common. It even has a name… the bystander effect.

It’s not necessarily because we are uncaring, but perhaps we don’t think we have time or don’t think we can adequately fix the problem. So, we just keep driving and/or ignore it.

Flatfoot, Senselessly Mature, Flat Tire, Breakdown

I don’t know ALL the ways to get around it, but I can relate. I am sure you have been there, too. One thing I have learned: Usually, doing something is better than doing nothing.

The radio personalities mentioned how, during a different song, someone gave $500 and someone else gave $5. But, it all counts. We all have something to give.

We can achieve more when we work together, each of us taking part in the solution. Teamwork makes the dream work! When everybody’s in, everybody wins!

I’m not saying you need to donate money to a cause. But maybe you can change a flat tire or call for a tow truck. Maybe you can watch someone’s kids in a pinch, or bring a meal for a hungry family, or help rake someone’s yard.

If you still don’t know what to do, then maybe a gift card or an encouraging word is good enough. Don’t overthink it. Each of us will serve in our own ways, but it all counts!

**********

God, thanks for all the ways You love us. Help us to be willing to step up and offer whatever we have. After all, everything we have comes from You. You are the giver of all good things. Give us wisdom to know what to do and the courage to do it. In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Questions: Have you ever offered to help a total stranger? How did it make you feel afterward? Was it worth it?

Tasks: Next time you see a chance to help someone, do! To see an example, read the story of the Good Samaritan. Pray for wisdom and courage… then follow through. Let God lead and see how He moves through you!

A Gentle Hello

Years ago, when Dave was sick in the hospital on any given Sunday, it bothered me to sit in the church service on my own. It was a reminder of all our pain.

After he died, I had to learn a whole new way of living. Sitting alone has gotten easier with practice, and now, I don’t mind.

These days, if certain friends are there, we will sit together. Still, we don’t always coordinate our schedules between the two services, so it may be hit or miss.

A couple of weeks ago at church, I sat in my usual area and waited for the service to begin. Sometimes, I catch up with emails or texts. But generally, I look for others who may need a friendly face to sit with. Not for my sake, but to encourage them.

That Sunday, I saw a young woman sitting alone in the pew in front of me. I leaned forward and introduced myself with a gentle hello.

To my surprise, I got a gruff ‘hey’ back. I asked a few more questions about herself, including her name. (Let’s call her Anna.) Mostly one-word answers. I could tell she didn’t want to talk with me. So, I silently prayed for her and left her alone.

The service ended, and by that time, one of my friends had come to sit with me. My friend and I started talking while I kept my eye on Anna. She quickly gathered her belongings and walked away. I noticed she lingered about fifteen feet away, but I couldn’t tell if she was needing prayer up in front or wanted to talk with me.

I decided to pray for her that following week, that God would soften her heart and meet her needs. I didn’t know what was going on, but I am glad He knows exactly what we need!

Then last week, I missed church because I was working. My mother-in-law was able to take Lydia to church for me, and thankfully, I can watch the service online! 

So, this week, I started off the service by sitting alone. I texted a couple of friends, but they had gone to the other service. Before I sat down, I greeted a couple of guests behind me and explained a few things about our church. They were very friendly.

Then, as the first song began, we stood up and started to worship God. That’s when I saw Anna make her way to the pew in front of me. Before she sat down, she saw me and quickly came over asking if I was the person that greeted her two weeks ago.

Of course, I said yes and invited her to sit with me. Anna apologized for her bad attitude from before and admitted she has been on the “wrong path” and that she is trying to make better life decisions now.

Apparently, she had been grumpy with me because she didn’t really want to be in church that day! She had been wrestling with God about her choices.

It was so cool to see the change in Anna’s attitude and on her face. We talked for a few minutes and I learned more about her background. After the service ended, we talked a little more.

I mentioned how difficult it is to do the Christian life on our own. Then, I introduced her to one of my friends as they have a few things in common. I’m hoping Anna will continue to come and get more involved.

As followers of Jesus, we often want to see Him do something BIG, or we wait around for a sign overlooking the small opportunities in front of us. Sometimes, God does give us a significant responsibility or task.

But how often does He just want us to say a gentle hello, or invite someone to sit with us? A kind word, smile, or prayer can go a long way in reaching people for the Kingdom of God. Don’t underestimate the power of being friendly!

Serving others may cost more than mere acknowledgment, however, so don’t stop at hello. It might mean picking someone up for an event or taking them to get groceries. In other words, God’s love is practical.

Let’s be open to all the possibilities and see what He does through us!

**********

God, thanks for the ways You use us. You can move large mountains, or work through a still, small voice. Help me not overlook simple opportunities to reach people for You. In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Question: Do you have a specific seat or pew at church, or do you like to move around? Do you enjoy greeting others or minding your own business?

Task: Wherever you are today, at church, work, school, or even the mall, take a few moments to get off your phone and look around for someone to encourage. Say hello or offer a compliment. Maybe it will be the start of a new friendship!

Love One Another

“Finally, all of you, be like-minded, be sympathetic, love one another, be compassionate and humble.” — 1 Peter 3:8, NIV

Recently, Lydia and I were talking about growth. She pointed out how she can’t ever tell how much she is growing until she wakes up and her pants are too short. Or, when she hugs me and she suddenly is above my shoulder. True story…she’s getting taller day by day!

My dear sister-in-law, Stephanie, is a new mom. I really enjoyed meeting my sweet little niece in July. Now, of course, Steph has been up all throughout the night. So, she’s had some extra quiet time to think… and I can already see growth! Steph posted something profound to her own social media account, and I asked her if I could share with you.

Here’s what she wrote:

“Having a baby has no doubt been rough, as anyone can imagine, but it has also been rich in lessons. When babies fuss and cry, we understand that it’s because they’re tired or hungry or in pain. Sometimes they’re just fussy. We don’t judge them. We don’t shut them out. We sympathize with them and try to soothe them.

As we grow older, we get so lost in our own world that we may be too quick to judge others when they are less than joyful. When we’re hungry, tired, not feeling well, or in pain, we’re irritable. We then tend to shut them out instead of understanding where they may be coming from. We should work on our understanding and patience and even celebrate successes, no matter how small or trivial or delayed they may seem in comparison. Let’s work on loving one another, taking care of one another and supporting one another.”

Thank you, Steph! We go to great lengths to protect and prepare our children for life. Indeed, parenting is a refining process. I am proud of you and all you have already learned. These days are tough, but they will get better soon.

 I really appreciated those wise words, especially in light of the last few days, weeks, months, and year. I hope all is well in your life, but chances are, there are some parts that need Jesus’ help and healing.

It’s okay to disagree with someone, but can we please treat them with compassion and understanding? Can we show even a measure of the grace and mercy we need, too?

There are many hurting people right now, considering COVID-19 (and all the competing viewpoints and losses), the earthquake in Haiti (plus tropical storms), wildfires, and the complete Taliban takeover in Afghanistan.

Amid death, destruction, and loss, people may feel frustrated, afraid, sad, helpless, grief or distressed. In some situations, it is common to feel angry or betrayed. There is likely to be an increase in mental health symptoms like PTSD, depression… and even avoidance. There are many questions, and to start, I have seen mixed reactions with the Veterans I serve.

Regardless of what you think (or think you know), can you put that aside for a moment and put yourself in someone else’s shoes? Can you imagine how they may feel? Each of these situations is beyond a simple solution. But, the next generation is watching how we handle these circumstances. You can make a difference now and in the future.

It might require some painful stretching and growth, but your attitude, prayers, words, and actions speak volumes. This may include donating some money or resources, or calling a friend or neighbor to check on them. This also may include keeping your mouth shut and honoring someone else’s preference. Be kind and considerate. Love one another.

Let’s demonstrate the love of Jesus to a world in need. He is our only Hope!

**********

God, thanks for being our hope and anchor when chaos comes. We know You are sovereign, but still, many people are hurting. Please bring Your peace and give us steadfast hearts. Lead us and help us grow. Help us love one another. In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Questions: How are you doing this week? How can I pray for you and lift you up?

Tasks: Take a moment right now and pray. Lift up our world in prayer: Afghanistan. Haiti. Pandemic crisis. Wild fires. First responders, legislators, armed forces, missionaries, men, women, children, family, friends, neighbors, coworkers. (If you feel led to help, consider donating money to your local church or Convoy of Hope, a reputable relief organization.)

Finding Grace #284

You may have seen the acronym GRACE as God’s Riches At Christ’s Expense. Grace is also God’s unmerited favor, or God doing for us what we cannot.

I find grace overflowing with God’s love, joy, peace, blessings, mercy, power, provision, protection, and wisdom. Thank You, Jesus!

Where did I find God’s love and favor—His abundant grace—this week?!

This was a good birthday week! It was a short work week, which included some chocolate cake and ice cream. I feel so grateful to have caring coworkers!

I also took off some time to host a guest. It had been awhile since she visited, so Lydia and I had fun showing her around our community. She left this morning, but it was nice to spend time with her!

Last night, our guest wanted to go to the Pyrotechnics Guild International finale show. This event rotates through Fargo every few years. Honestly, I wasn’t sure I was up for it, since fireworks events go so late. They are cool from a distance, but the booming noise and flashing lights aren’t my favorite. Nonetheless, I agreed to go and it was fun. We didn’t get home until after midnight, but it was an adventure, after all!

Today, we did a little cleaning and laundry before we relaxed. Later, we went to a park so Lydia could show me some skills she recently mastered! I’m grateful for the ebb and flow, some busy days and some easy-going days!

**********

These are only a few examples, but God’s grace never runs out!

There’s grace in every situation—we just need to look for it. God promises if we seek Him, we will find Him (see Jeremiah 29:13)!

Quit Spinning Your Wheels!

Have you ever felt like you are just spinning your wheels and getting nowhere fast? Perhaps you are not making progress on your goals due to always being on-the-go, running from one activity to the next. Or, maybe you don’t know which path to take next. Life is full of tough decisions, and sometimes we have to quit what we are doing to regroup. 

This week, I had an interesting conversation with a friend about such decisions. Nothing unusual… just choices that carry weight and impact.

These include decisions regarding finances, education, volunteering, and relationships. Unfortunately, she’s been so ‘busy’ she can’t think straight, and people keep asking her to be involved in activities that are draining her of time, energy, and peace.

Of course, since I am older, I have faced similar circumstances in the past. Each time, I learned invaluable lessons which prompted a new level of growth and maturity.

Examples: Boundaries and the wordNo’ are powerful!

My friend will have to make her own decisions, of course. I simply mentioned how important solitude had been for me, especially in college when I was trying to make so many of the same decisions.

Being alone is scary for a lot of people, but solitude is different than being lonely.

For me, solitude is taking time away, so I can quit spinning my wheels. Then, I can figure out how I really think and feel. Solitude brings clarity when I am confused because it eliminates the extra noise and distractions. Then, I can weigh the pros and cons.

It took me awhile to be okay with solitude, but it has served me well over the years. Spending time alone has helped me know who I am and who I am not. I have gained insight on my priorities and what I enjoy doing (versus what I happen to do when others are around). Pausing every now and then has helped set the trajectory for my life.

In some ways, solitude primed me for dealing with grief when Dave died because I understood how to pay attention to my feelings and not run away from them. In part, solitude taught me that uncomfortable moments do not last forever. Sometimes, we wish they would hurry on by, but we can grow to appreciate those awkward times, too!

In my case, I am never truly alone because solitude also involves connecting with God through prayer. It may include making lists or taking walks in nature, too. Or, perhaps it is an act of solitude to leave work an hour early to sit in the daycare parking lot and journal while listening to music. Yes, solitude is a part of self-care.

Solitude does not mean isolation…. or being alone forever, avoiding other people or their input. It just means hitting the brakes and checking the map to see if you are heading where you intended, or if you need to redirect.

There is no badge for busyness or skimping on sleep. Don’t let other people dictate what you do in life… you are responsible for your own happiness.

Jesus Himself was known for taking time away to spend with His Father. He relied on that quiet time to listen and gather His thoughts. I wonder what happened in those intimate moments between Jesus, His Father, and the Holy Spirit!

Perhaps getting away helped Jesus to refocus on His mission and renew His strength. Either way, He relied on God’s help to accomplish all He did!

These days, I don’t have many opportunities to “get away,” but I am reminded just how vital solitude can be. These skills take time and space and effort, but thankfully, God is always with us! He never leaves us nor forsakes us. He can bring solace in solitude, if only we quit spinning our wheels long enough to listen!

**********

God, thanks for being our Friend and Guide! May we pause in solitude and gratitude, inviting You to show us what to do next. May we receive Your best. In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Questions: Do you enjoy being alone, or do you merely tolerate it when needed? How can you apply the idea of solitude for making decisions?

Tasks: If you have some big decisions ahead of you, take some time to clear your head and pray. Tune your heart to what the Holy Spirit may be telling you. For further reading, check out this article.