Tag: grief

Posted on in Being Gracious, Fear/Don't Fake Brave, Gratitude, Miscellaneous, Perseverance, Wisdom

A Path Forward

While last year, 2020, was a bust for many reasons, it was not all bad. For some people it was their worst year in recent memory, but that does not mean nothing good happened.

Each person deserves to feel and grieve however works best for them. The important thing is to actually deal with those emotions in healthy ways. If you’ve lost a loved one or a job or an important opportunity or event, it’s 100% normal to be sad or upset.

But, don’t toss aside what remains.

Whatever happens, God is holding you. Draw closer to Him, so He can help you get through it. Where there seems to be no way, He will make a path for you.

I did not make any resolutions for the new year. There are so many potential opportunities to make changes, but it seems most people try to do too much all at once and then quit. Instead, I have found making small, sustainable decisions can lead to long-term habits and success. Being consistent helps!

This year, I am reading through the Chronological NLT Bible again with friends. I really enjoy the materials from Aaron at biay.org, but this year, I am adding another resource, too. A journal and videos from Read thru the Word by Word Up Ministries.

Reading the Bible is a daily habit worth cultivating. In His wisdom, God’s Word has something new for us each time we read it. There’s always something to learn! The Bible was not meant for us to keep it on the shelf!

This week, I was reminded we don’t read the Bible just to learn nice lessons or learn about self-improvement. We read to learn Who God is and understand His character. This helps us understand His love and goodness.

When we know the heart of God, we can accept that His ways are higher than ours. We don’t have to get bent out of shape when our circumstances change, or are about to change. Trust in the Lord!

Each journey around the sun carries new opportunities. We only have so much time on this Earth, but each day is a new chance to cling to the Lord and all of His promises.

What are you bringing into this new day, or new year?

You could take fear, anxiety, and worry. You could also pack in some anger, bitterness, and resentment. Those are a little heavy, but somewhat understandable.

Or, you could bring faith, joy, peace, and gratitude with you! These are a much lighter load, and by God’s grace, they will give you the boost you need to keep moving forward.

The stakes are higher than ever, but we can trust God is in control. Let Him show you how to make lemonade on His terms. He’s got this.

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God, thanks for bringing us through many trials and troubles. You are so faithful and good! Help us trust You for greater things. In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Question: Do your goals, plans, and dreams fill you with faith, joy, peace, and gratitude? Or, are you stuck because of fear, anxiety, worry, anger, bitterness, or resentment? What are you going to do with this knowledge?

Tasks: As you are setting up goals for the year, remember to run your plans by God first! Trust Him to take care of you regardless of ever-changing circumstances.

Posted on in Being Gracious, Gratitude, Miscellaneous, Perseverance, Words

Get A Grip!!

Last week, my coworkers and I received training on a device that measures grip strength. The tool is called a dynamometer (say that three times fast!). There are other types that measure torque for engines, but, in healthcare, they are much more simple.

Dietitians use dynamometers to measure changes in grip strength over the course of time. We had fun figuring out the devices and practicing our skills on each other.

Through assessing grip strength, we can see changes in overall functional status and assess a patient’s risk for malnutrition. If you have lost a lot of strength in your hands, you have most likely lost strength elsewhere. Not to mention balance and coordination of major muscle groups. Think… stairs and fall risks.

Plus, if you are having difficulty opening jars and cans, or spreading peanut butter, or carrying heavy pots and pans, you may not be getting much variety in your diet. So, this could lead to other nutrition concerns, as well. Needless to say, building and keeping our strength is important!

While we were learning, the phrase “get a grip” came to mind. This translated to thoughts about how it might pertain to both God and life!

“Get a grip!” is often said in regards to someone losing it. In this context, it is most likely said in reference to a mental or emotional battle. However, that’s not really a fair assessment, as our individual struggles can’t really be measured from the outside.

We each face life with different coping skills, too. If two people are facing the same challenge, one person may fly through it and the other person may crawl. Especially during the holidays, in pandemics, and in times of grief.

Fear, anxiety, or worry all can build up and make us lose our focus. Or, we can feel out of control when we let obstacles overwhelm us. If this cycle continues, it can keep us from making progress in life.

Thankfully, our weaknesses are no match for God’s strength!

The Bible is full of verses about the strength of God’s hand. He is quite formidable toward those who are against Him. But even amid conflict and trials, He never stops thinking about and protecting His loved ones.

Psalm 138:7 (NIV), says, “Though I walk in the midst of trouble, you preserve my life. You stretch out your hand against the anger of my foes; with your right hand you save me.”

When God gets a grip, He never lets go! From my limited human point of view, I imagine this looking like a REALLY BIG bear hug.

To anyone who messes with us: “Don’t you dare mess with her!! Get out of here!! She’s mine!!”

And to those He loves: “Come here, dear child. Rest easy. I’ve got you right here, protected. You are mine.”

Whatever you are dealing with today, or this season, or this year, you don’t have to handle it on your own. Give it to God. He will sort through the mess and give you rest and peace. He will hold you close and give you His strength.

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God, thanks for taking such good care of us! You go before us and fight our battles. Please give us wisdom and courage as we rest in your grace and peace. Surround us with Your love. In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Questions: Have you ever used a dynamometer? For engines or hand grip?! What comes to mind when you hear “get a grip?” How can you bring your worries to God today?

Tasks: Remember the impact our words can have on others. “Get a grip” comes in many other flavors, such as “get over it” and “move on already.” Be gentle and gracious.

Posted on in Gratitude, Journey of Grace, Miscellaneous, Perseverance, Wisdom, Worship

Paper Chains and Peace

You’ve probably heard the saying, “If you don’t like the weather, wait five minutes and it will change.” Just about everything cycles back around, including emotions, birthdays, and holidays. There are seasons of much and seasons of little.

There are days we can’t get enough of something, and there are days we get tired of the very same thing! Excitement gets balanced by apathy, as the newness wears and off, and becomes, well, old. But, like most things, soon we start the cycle again.

As we start December, I am grateful. I’m praising God that when everything else changes, He remains the same. Jesus is our one constant in amid chaos and change.

Whether I am having an awesome day or a less-than-stellar day, He is there. When I feel on top of my to-do list, or when I can’t even find my to-do list, Jesus is my guide.

As we head into the Christmas season, remember you don’t have to have it all together. Grief can be particularly difficult during the holidays. It’s okay not to be okay. Especially this year!

But, when darkness presses in, cling to Jesus, the Light of the World. 

Also, don’t be afraid to switch it up. Certain traditions can take a break if needed. If that happens, perhaps even some new memories will be made!

Maybe, like me, you are keeping the decorations simple. Going through a pile of memories and ornaments isn’t always helpful, so this year, we opted for a red, white, and green paper chain while watching Home Alone. We may still add a few ornaments, when we get the time, but I am giving myself the grace to just see what happens. No pressure.

For anyone struggling this season, it’s okay to feel how you feel. Just remember to take it to Jesus. He loves you more than you can understand, and He knows exactly what you need. That’s why He came… to save us and help us. He is our Living Hope!

I’m grateful that Christmas is not about the decorations, gifts, or even the wonderful Christmas music. It’s about God seeing our pain and suffering and sadness, and then doing what only He could do to bring peace, healing, comfort and joy… for good.

Christmas is all about Jesus; some people will understand that this year more than ever. There are many beautiful aspects of the season, but let’s keep it simple and focus on Jesus. Just like the song, O Holy Night, says, “fall on your knees” and worship Him!

Only He can make all things right in due time.

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God, thank you for Jesus and all He is to us! Thank you that He came to save us, something we could never do on our own. Lord, You are so good. Help us glorify you in all things. In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Questions: Have you already started decorating for Christmas? Are you planning to keep all your special traditions this year… or switch it up?

Tasks: I challenge you to rethink your traditions and why you do them. Do they honor God and family, or are they really just a distraction? Pick your best options and consider letting go of the rest (at least for this year).

Posted on in Gratitude, Journey of Grace, Life is Short, Miscellaneous, Parenting, Perseverance, Prayer, Wisdom, Worship

Special Days Are Still Difficult

As I previously mentioned, Lydia’s 9th birthday was last weekend! We had a fun day together, as you might expect. But, as the evening wore on and bedtime grew close, Lydia started feeling sad.

Perhaps she was already feeling sad, but she didn’t say anything earlier in the day. We were watching “Jingle Jangle” on Netflix, and I thought everything was going well. But toward the end of the show, Lydia started softly crying.

She said the show was sad, although I hadn’t noticed anything overly sad about it. It could have been the fact that it was growing late, or maybe it was just coming down after a high point (celebrating her birthday). Either way, I still needed to help her understand and deal with her emotions.

I silently prayed for help and asked Lydia to share what was on her mind. She couldn’t quite express her thoughts, so I asked a few questions to get her talking. She missed her dad, my late husband, Dave.

Soon, I remembered I had some of Dave’s clothes, saved for this very reason. Around seven years ago, I had packaged up a medium-sized box of his favorite shirts and a pair of jeans, so Lydia could one day understand more about how tall he was and his interests.

I asked Lydia if she wanted to see the clothes, and naturally, she said yes. Going through the box was bittersweet… and, I had to explain what that word means. Each piece of clothing brought back specific memories with Dave or reminded me who he was.

To me, the saddest part of all is that Lydia doesn’t have memories of Dave. She just has his clothes, his pictures, and other people’s memories. Nonetheless, I validated Lydia’s emotions and acknowledged that it was normal to feel sad, angry, or even a sense of unfairness. As she grows, so does her grief.

I offered to wash her Daddy’s clothes so she could hold them close. Just about every week, she wears her Caterpillar sweatshirt and a couple of t-shirts honoring Dave. She quickly asked if she could wear them around the house or to sleep in some of them. Sure!

I started a load of laundry, never thinking I would wash those items again… Then, I coached Lydia how to handle those difficult emotions.

I explained that some people want to run away from their emotions or numb the pain in various ways. But that doesn’t really take care of the problem, it just prolongs it.

I encouraged Lydia to do the following. We can:

  1. Draw near to God, asking Him to help us through the pain. We can tell Jesus all about it. He understands and knows exactly what we need.
  2. Share our pain with someone trustworthy. Our feelings are not the only thing, but they still are valid. Not everyone will understand, but find someone who will let you cry it out, if needed, and who won’t just tell you to get over it.
  3. Sit with the pain, as long as needed. Just let it be. Try to get to the root of the problem to understand how to deal with it appropriately.
  4. Then, find someone else you can help with the lessons you learned. Be gentle and don’t assume that everyone wants to be helped. Trust God to use your pain to bring comfort and peace where it is needed most.

Lydia and I sat on the couch for quite awhile, maybe an hour. My legs were falling asleep, as she was snuggled on my lap. It was well past bedtime when I finally turned out her light. Parents want to shield their children from pain, but there are still some situations where that’s not possible.

The next day, I gave Dave’s clean clothes to Lydia. She embraced them and took them straight to her room. She picked out the largest sweatshirt she could find and wore it the rest of the day. She even slept in it and said she had the best sleep ever. Thank You, Jesus!

Thanksgiving is tomorrow, and that will look dramatically different for many of us. For me and Lydia, it’s par for the course. We’ve had seven years to adjust, but then again, we’ve been adjusting for seven years! Special days are still difficult at times.

This year, people around the world are missing their loved ones who either passed from COVID or who are socially distancing to protect themselves or others. I’m so sorry.

In the struggle, remember it’s normal to feel how you feel. Let it out and deal with it in healthy ways. Pray, journal, call your loved ones, take a nap, go for a walk, etc.

Also please remember you are loved. You are not alone. We are in this together, and God is here with us. Despite all we have lost, we still have so much to be thankful for.

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God, thanks for always being there for us, in the good times and bad. Thank you we can draw near to You at any time of day, no matter how we are feeling. Please be with each of us, and wrap us in Your love and grace. Help us keep our eyes on You, not our circumstances. In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Questions: Are you altering your plans this holiday season? What is your favorite tradition, and can you put a new spin on it? What are you most thankful for this year?

Tasks: Make a gratitude list, or write down what is going well. Be on the lookout for ways you can encourage others. You might be surprised how God uses your pain to help someone else!

Posted on in Books and Movies I Like, Fear/Don't Fake Brave, Gratitude, Journey of Grace, Kindness, Life is Short, Miscellaneous, Wisdom

God’s Kindness, A Calling Card

Recently, I was talking with a lady who was widowed about a year ago. Understandably, she has been missing her late husband quite a bit, especially as we head into the holiday season. As a result, she has been reading books and articles about the afterlife.

It may be comforting to read about what our loved ones are experiencing in Heaven (if they go there), but she mentioned some ideas that made me a little wary. Humans who die do not become guardian angels, for instance!

I did my best to answer her questions about my own grief journey. Then, I guided her to the Truth…that is, I pointed her back to Jesus!!

Later, my friend said, “God’s judgment doesn’t seem as bad as one would expect,” based on her reading of other people’s near death experiences. I didn’t ask what she was referencing, but still, I felt the need to gently clarify a few things for her.

First, God’s judgment and wrath is very serious. He doesn’t play favorites, punishing some sinners but not others. We see this over and over in the Bible. 

In the Old Testament, God banished Adam and Eve from the Garden of Eden. Then, we read about the Flood, and later, King David losing a child as a result of adultery. We also see Judah being exiled to Assyria and Israel being exiled to Babylon after generations of debauchery. And, these were God’s chosen people!

In the New Testament, new Christians (Ananias and Sapphira) were struck dead for lying to the Holy Spirit. There are other cases of pending judgment in the book of Revelation.

Second, God’s judgment is not unjust or without warning. He sent His Word through many prophets over many years, and later, Jesus Christ Himself! He warns us about the consequences of our choices. He asks us to confess our sins and turn from evil, choosing Life over Death. Then, He repeatedly gives us opportunities to repent and make things right. 

Apparently, we are slow learners, but I’m thankful He is so patient with us!

Nonetheless, there are consequences for our actions. For better or worse, we reap what we sow. Indeed, the Bible says we will be held accountable for our words and our actions.

Third, God’s mercy, grace, and forgiveness are bountiful. If we know Jesus and have accepted His FREE GIFT of salvation, we don’t have to be afraid of death or judgment. I am guessing this is what my friend meant to say.

Romans 2 is all about God’s law and judgment, but Romans 2:4 says that God’s kindness leads us to repentance. I love that! We see His generosity all around us, and His kindness is like a calling card. Oh, how God wants us to know Him and be with Him! 

It’s like when someone goes out of their way to bless you, help you, or meet a huge need. You are so thankful, you can’t help but live differently. You may ‘pay it forward’ or return the favor, or just become really close to the person because you appreciate what they did for you.

So it is with God’s kindness. He overwhelms us with His goodness, and we can’t help but bask in His love! We can never repay Him, but we can live differently as a result.

Only God’s love (through Jesus) can bring the true change we need. When we know how much He loves us, our lives will start to change. In gratitude, we can acknowledge the good things in our lives and give Him full credit! Let’s come to Jesus and receive His peace and joy today!

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God, You are so gracious and good to me. Thanks for all You do! Help me not take Your kindness for granted. I want to make choices that honor You. In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Questions: Have you accepted God’s free gift of salvation? How has God been kind to you? How has His kindness changed how you think and act (i.e. repent)?

Tasks: If you are curious to learn more, check out the book, Heaven, by Randy Alcorn. (There are still some things we just won’t know until we get there, but the author gives a comprehensive explanation and breaks down key points based on Scripture.)

**If you don’t know if you will end up in Heaven after you die, make that decision today!**

Posted on in Finding Grace Weekly Recap, Life is Short, Miscellaneous, Parenting, Perseverance, Prayer

Finding Grace #229

You may have seen the acronym GRACE as God’s Riches At Christ’s Expense. Grace is also God’s unmerited favor, or God doing for us what we cannot.

I find grace overflowing with God’s love, joy, peace, blessings, mercy, power, provision, protection, and wisdom. Thank You, Jesus!

Where did I find God’s love and favor—His abundant grace—this week?

This was a heavy and emotional week. A friend’s brother back home died unexpectedly, and many hearts were broken. It is a sad and difficult situation, and I hope the community can pull together and support my friend’s family. It will be a long road to healing.

I made some good progress on several projects this week, but I also realized how much more I have to do on all of them! It’s all good, though. I am grateful to have so many ‘outlets’ that bring joy. Lydia telling me she is proud of me is icing on the cake!

Yesterday, I had three enriching conversations with people. I felt excited and fulfilled to talk with people who ‘get’ me. Altogether, I spent nearly five hours on the phone! On two calls, I walked around the house and got well over 10,000 steps!

Today, I worked on my projects more, mowed, and spent quality time with Lydia. The next two weeks are fairly full, so I am trying to get things done ahead of time. I am trying to make plans, while also trying to relax!

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These are only a few examples, but God’s grace never runs out!

There’s grace in every situation—we just need to look for it. God promises if we seek Him, we will find Him (see Jeremiah 29:13)!

Posted on in Being Gracious, Fear/Don't Fake Brave, Journey of Grace, Life is Short, Miscellaneous, Parenting, Perseverance, Prayer, Wisdom

A Short List

Well, this has been a full week so far. On Monday, I received some awful news that a friend’s brother died in his sleep. A husband and father of two. A beloved son, brother, and friend to many. It was completely unexpected, and it certainly rocked the small community where I grew up. This hit home for many reasons, besides the fact that he was about Dave’s age.

Sadly, this is not the first young man I grew up with, who has suddenly passed away in my peer group or hometown. My dear friend and classmate, Seth, died when we were in high school. In college, my cousin, Nick, died, as well as another friend, Wes. More recently, these premature deaths included another classmate, Clint, and another friend, Ryan, among others. And now, Nathan. All different circumstances, but tragic nonetheless.

I explained a little of my heartache to Lydia, but there is so much she does not yet understand. Even though Dave died when she was little, she doesn’t remember him. She doesn’t feel the anguish I have felt over the years, especially as death steals away those we know and love. Of course, she feels a different pain than I do.

Still, this week has had many silver linings. Celebrating life with Lydia on a fancy dress-up day at daycare. My brother’s birthday. Progress on a couple projects. Cheering a friend on a difficult path. Talking with my family and remembering the brevity of life.

If you are still alive, God has given you much grace and much mercy. I hope you will acknowledge His deep love for you today. Reach out to Him; He is right there with you.

Through several texts, my family had a side conversation about grace and forgiveness, and I was reminded to keep ‘a short list’ with others. We never know when our time is up.

When I think about my interactions with others, I think about how I want to be remembered. What will people say about me when I die? Will it be positive or mixed? Did I focus on what really matters? That is, loving God and loving people.

Furthermore, if my actions today set the stage for how I will be remembered, what should I be doing differently? I want to live my life fully with no regrets, doing all God has for me to do before He calls me HOME. Hopefully, many decades from now!

My ‘short list’ includes extending grace and forgiveness to others; telling my family and close friends how much I love them; encouraging people; staying present with Jesus; and telling others by telling others how He changed my life. Tomorrow is never guaranteed, so do the most important things today!

Indeed, life is so short, and in our current circumstances every situation seems full of drama and uncertainty. This year has been loaded, for sure. It can be scary at times, but, we do not have to fear death or anything else!

We will never have all the answers for why bad things happen. There are so many variables, and the rain falls on us all. The best thing you can do is to let Jesus be your PEACE. He’s got this.

When I meet Jesus face to face, I will give an account about how I lived my life. None of my good works will make a difference for whether or not I get into Heaven. The only thing that matters is if I accepted Jesus Christ as my Lord and Savior on Earth.

The good things I do will be rewarded, yes, but only if I know Jesus first! We can never be good enough on our own. So, it boils down to this: Knowing Jesus as Lord and Savior.

I am thankful that everything that really matters is secure in Jesus. He comforts us in the midst of tragedies and redeems our pain. Death does not get the final word!

God is Our Rock and Our Refuge. Everything we need is in Him!

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God, thank You for the gift of Life. Please comfort those who are facing grief and loss today. Continue to walk with them and draw them near to You. Pour out Your love on them, Jesus. In Your Name, Amen

Questions: What is on your ‘short list’ in life? How do you want people to remember you? What are you doing differently as a result? (if anything)

Tasks: Call or send a card (or if appropriate, show up!) to comfort those who are struggling right now. This could include grief, loss, physical health, mental health, or other COVID related issues. Be the hands and feet of Jesus!

Posted on in Being Gracious, Life is Short, Miscellaneous, Perseverance, Personality, Wisdom

A Life Well-Lived

Christian evangelist and apologist, Ravi Zacharias, stepped into eternity yesterday morning after a brief battle with sarcoma. His death has been reported by several news organizations as tributes continue to pour in. He is already missed by people all around the world.

I have followed Ravi Zacharias International Ministries (RZIM) for a few years, at least. I am saddened for our collective loss. At the same time, I rejoice that he is pain-free and in the presence of Jesus.

Ravi Zacharias was well-known for his quick wit, intellect, and for teaching us to use our God-given brains. Imagine that! Although, he has been compared to C.S. Lewis and a few others, he is unparalleled in his own right.

When dealing with challenging topics, Ravi Zacharias could hold his own and keep his cool. He was well-respected by people from many cultures and religions. He was invited to speak to Muslims, Hindus, Buddhists, and Mormons, among others.

I appreciate how he always pointed people back to Jesus. He never forced the issues at hand, but sought to build bridges. In defending the Christian faith, it wasn’t about making demands or being right. He knew he was right, however!

Instead, Ravi Zacharias confidently sought to glorify God and show grace to his opponents. In addition to his passion for logical debate, he was known for being kind and gracious. He always had a smile and was a gentleman! What a testimony!

Especially today, we can continue to learn and benefit from his example. Faith and logic can coincide together. We don’t have to choose, and we don’t have to argue. We don’t have to let differences or disagreements separate us or distract us from what is most important. We can spread God’s love and leave the outcomes with Him.

Ravi Zacharias made the case that for a religion to be real, it needs to stand the test of not only logic but live-ability. He concluded that only Christianity meets those empirical and practical requirements. And then, he proved it in his own life.

We, too, can live out our faith by combining sound principles and lovingkindness. God is on our side, so we don’t need to give in to conspiracy theories or fear. We don’t need to strong-arm someone who doesn’t eye-to-eye with us. We also don’t have to defend God! He will set the record straight. We just need to have courage and obey.

There will never be another Ravi Zacharias. Indeed, it is incredible to see what God can do through us when we honor Him with a life well-lived.

Thankfully, he had the foresight to develop a team of people to follow after him. It will be interesting to see how they carry on his legacy at RZIM.

I pray for his family and close friends to have peace and comfort in the coming days. Even in the sadness, I am excited to see what God will do next. The best is yet to come!

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Heavenly Father, thanks for Your wisdom and grace. Thanks for giving us power, love, and a sound mind (2 Tim. 1:7). Thanks for loving us so much and for revealing Yourself to us.

Questions: Have you read any Ravi Zacharias books or heard him speak? Which book is your favorite? How have you been impacted by his testimony?

Tasks: It is common to question God in times of loss. But, we don’t have to be angry or upset for long. God knows what He is doing in all situations. He does not cause sickness and death, but He will use them for His glory and our good. If you are facing painful circumstances, draw near to God. He is close to the brokenhearted. He longs to help you.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Posted on in Finding Grace Weekly Recap, Journey of Grace, Life is Short, Little Free Library, Miscellaneous, Perseverance

Finding #219

You may have seen the acronym GRACE as God’s Riches At Christ’s Expense. Grace is also God’s unmerited favor, or God doing for us what we cannot.

I find grace overflowing with God’s love, joy, peace, blessings, mercy, power, provision, protection, and wisdom. Thank You, Jesus!

Where did I find God’s love and favor—His abundant grace—this week?

This was a fantastic week! Mother’s Day was really fun. Lydia gave me some great gifts, with my mom’s help. She even threw me a beach party (with decorations) in the living room. Later, we Zoomed with my family again. I’m really enjoying our weekly chat!

Work was busy, but really good. All my patients listened to me and were making progress on their goals, which is always fun to see. It was gratifying to know I am helping them!

Friday was the seventh anniversary of Dave’s death. I prefer to celebrate his legacy and that he is in Heaven rather than give cancer and death any more press. It also helps remind me that, because of Jesus, death is not the final word. We have Victory over death!

The weather on Friday was absolutely gorgeous. Lydia and I went walking along the river, listened to birds sing, and found a little free library. We enjoyed Caribou drinks and some chocolate truffles from my sister and brother-in-law. I always give Lydia a gift in Dave’s honor, so yesterday she received some STEM toys (dealing with various topics like, gravity, electric circuits, and lasers). Then, my neighbor/friend came over to chat. We talked for hours and it was so great to catch up! I appreciated all the calls, texts, phone calls, and gifts from friends and family. Thanks so much!

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These are only a few examples, but God’s grace never runs out!

There’s grace in every situation—we just need to look for it. God promises if we seek Him, we will find Him (see Jeremiah 29:13)!

Posted on in Fear/Don't Fake Brave, Journey of Grace, Miscellaneous, Parenting, Perseverance

See A Victory

“The weapon may be formed, but it won’t prosper
When the darkness falls, it won’t prevail
‘Cause the God I serve knows only how to triumph
My God will never fail
Oh, my God will never fail

I’m gonna see a victory
I’m gonna see a victory
For the battle belongs to You, Lord”

–From “See A Victory” by Elevation Worship

This coming Friday marks seven years since Dave died. It doesn’t seem like it should already be that long, but here we are. I am so grateful for God’s faithfulness.

Lydia continues to process what Dave’s absence means for her. It is an on going development as she learns and grows. We’ve had many in-depth conversations in the last six months, in particular. Thanks for your continued prayers.

It is still bittersweet at times, but I am amazed when I think about how far God has brought us. We have certainly had our battles, but each time, God has come through for us.

Just think: God has never lost a battle. He always claims Victory!

I don’t know what life would be like if Dave were still here. He could still be sick or totally healed. But truthfully, it does me no good to think about all the ‘what ifs,’ and I don’t have time or mental space for that rabbit trail.

What I do know is this: I have seen major Victories in my life that I probably would not have noticed or achieved any other way. For instance, I started this blog and put myself ‘out there.’ I wrote a book (details soon!!!) and started a business. I have continued learning various skills and am teaching others. In the fall, I started an awesome job serving Veterans. I have grown through parenting Lydia. That’s the short list! 

If things had turned out differently, perhaps I would not have been compelled to cling to the Lord in the way I have. And, I would have continued second-guessing myself and my ability. Not anymore!

Becoming who I am now has taken time, effort, and a lot of intention. But, I am not the same person. I am stronger and more stable. I make quicker and more solid decisions, without fearing the outcomes like I used to. That doesn’t mean I don’t make mistakes, just that I am more confident when I say YES and when I say NO.

Victory, for me, is choosing faith as my default, not fear.  This big Victory has lead to many smaller Victories along the way. They just keep coming!

As a result, I have much more peace internally. I don’t feel the need to prove myself or do things perfectly. I have stopped putting limits on what I can do! I am happy to be just me, knowing with Jesus, that is enough.

I have also made various lifestyle changes in recent years. I still am involved with several activities, but they are choices I make on purpose. I want to, not I ‘have’ to.

I have taken on more challenges and cool projects as my capacity has grown. We don’t think about grief every day, thankfully, so we are able to handle other things. Plus, Lydia has been able to care for many of her own needs. I still supervise and help, of course.

Lydia and I enjoy doing a lot of fun things these days. When she was little, it felt more like survival mode. She need a lot of care and I was grieving. But now, we are thriving.

For Mother’s Day, on Sunday, Lydia gave me a little book that she filled out all on her own. (Thanks to my mom for buying it and sending it to her!) A common theme was that I have taught Lydia to be brave and not give up. Amen!

Ironically, I could never show Lydia bravery or perseverance if I hadn’t had to face my worst fears. And, I couldn’t do that without Jesus. He taught me what it means to be brave, and now I have the honor of passing those lessons on.

These days, we play games, go on adventures, make food and art together, and laugh a whole lot. On Friday, we will do something fun to celebrate Dave’s life and memory. We may eat his favorite foods, play a game, or go on a walk.

I will also give Lydia a special gift in Dave’s honor. He would be so very proud of her.

Loving Jesus, and living a fun, adventurous faith-filled life… a wholehearted Victory!

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Heavenly Father, all praise and honor to YOU!! Thanks for all the Victories in my life (including many more I haven’t mentioned here!). Help me continue to trust You for greater things! In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Questions: What Victories have you seen in your life this year? What would you do if you had unlimited resources and there was no way you could fail?

Tasks: Listen to “See A Victory” by Elevation Worship. Trust God and make bold moves today. We cannot lose with Jesus on our side! He has never lost a battle! Victory is His!