Book Review: The Ruthless Elimination of Hurry

I hope you had a great holiday weekend! I am thankful for the brave men and women who gave their lives so we could celebrate or have the freedom to spend our time as we wish, more or less. Their sacrifices and those of their families are not forgotten.

We had a fairly relaxing weekend and prepared for a few upcoming plans. It is good to be able to rest and take breaks by ourselves and with friends and family. Life is too short not to have fun sometimes!

Recently, I have been reading a good book called The Ruthless Elimination of Hurry by John Mark Comer. It talks about how fast we go through life and all we risk missing. Essentially, we must stay in-step with Jesus’ perfect pace (which we often perceive as S-L-O-O-O-O-W).

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Each of us has unique limitations, and most of us want to push past them! According to Comer, our limitations include our physical bodies, minds/thoughts, giftings, personalities and emotional wiring, families of origin, socioeconomic factors, education and careers, seasons of life and responsibilities, and God’s call on our lives. Some of these are great strengths, actually, but they still carry weight in how we live and the choices we make.

Sometimes, it is okay to rush, like in an emergency. But most of the time, being frantic leaves us frazzled. At the minimum, our body’s stress response takes a while to return to baseline, and over time, this leads to chronic inflammation and illnesses.

Over the years, and even more lately, I have had to step back from busyness. I am working on accepting (and understanding) my limitations as a widow and single mom. I am so grateful for the ways Jesus has covered me since I cannot be several places at once. I am becoming more choosy about my yeses. God knows all my strengths and limitations; He is using them to shape me and make me more like Jesus.

Loving well takes time. Joy involves staying in the moment. Peace requires wisdom and intention. Patience, kindness, goodness, gentleness, faithfulness, self control… All of these require a slower pace. We cannot bear the fruits of the Spirit if we are rushing off to the next thing.

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I highly recommend Comer’s book, which is food for thought and actionable. He reminds us of the Sabbath and the importance of rest. He encourages us to embrace simplicity and enjoy silence and solitude regularly. Comer suggests using airplane mode on your cell phone and having boundaries for using it. He says to intentionally put ourselves in the long line at the grocery store to build patience and make ourselves uncomfortable. These are just a few ideas; even if you do half of what he says, it will be good.

These ideas do not promote checking out of society but freeing yourself up to follow Jesus more closely. By taking time with Him, listening, and obeying, we will be working in His strength and have a greater impact than when we are doing it with our own effort, running on fumes.

Isn’t that what we want? To stay close to Jesus and influence others for Him. Instead, we are racing to keep up with the world and shortchanging ourselves in the process. Yikes!

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God, thanks for calling us to a slower pace with You. Help us eliminate any distractions so we can fulfill our true calling—to experience Your goodness and bring others to You. In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Question: Do you find yourself stressed and striving each day, or are you calm and clear on what you need to accomplish in God’s timing and strength?

Tasks: Read and meditate (mull over) Matthew 11:28-30. Think about any changes you might need to make so you can experience God’s rest.

Praise The Lord!

Well, we made it past May 15th, and now I feel lighthearted again! Whew! Thanks, Lord! Suddenly, it feels like all is well. I can smile and sing a little more freely, and I can focus on other things again. 🙂

In other news, Lydia and I are making good progress reading the Bible chronologically in a year. We came across some of David’s last words in 2 Samuel 22, though they are also represented in the Psalms. It reminded me of a fun song I learned at a Christian summer camp as a kid.

I started singing the song, and had to share it with Lydia. Of course, I had to do the motions too, which happened to make us look like ninjas. It made her laugh so much, which I love. Maybe she will share it with her friends at camp this summer!

It’s funny how God’s Word and music can change our emotions and help us work through tough moments (or months, in my case!). Our emotions are indicators (signs) not dicators (telling us how to feel or think). God’s Word is Truth, and it has the power to change our lives.

We don’t have to live by our emotions! We don’t have to live in fear, stay sad, or harbor anger. We should allow them space so we learn from them, but then we can keep moving forward and let them point us back to Jesus.

Our emotions come from Him, and we can express them in various ways. All of them are valid, but they are only helpful to a point. If we offer them a place to stay, then they may take over. Instead, let’s see them as dear guests, just regularly passing through. Then, they can come and go freely.

Jesus, on the other hand, well, we can build our lives on Him! Our songs of praise and acts of kindness toward others can illuminate His goodness, grace, mercy, justice, peace, joy, etc. He is so good and worthy of praise!

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God, You are so worthy of all our praise! Thanks for all the ways You bless us. May we turn all our emotions over to You, and help us live for You. In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Questions: What are your favorite songs that put you in a good mood? Do you tend to hold onto your emotions or do you release them?

Tasks: Sing, dance, laugh, talk, cry… it all counts. Praise the Lord!

Finding Grace #428

You may have seen the acronym GRACE as God’s Riches At Christ’s Expense. Grace is also God’s unmerited favor, or God doing for us what we cannot.

I find grace overflowing with God’s love, joy, peace, blessings, mercy, power, provision, protection, and wisdom. Thank You, Jesus!

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Where did I find God’s love and favor—His abundant grace—this week?!

This was another good week. Thanks for all your support and encouragement on Wednesday, the eleventh anniversary of Dave’s death. I really appreciate your kind words and prayers!

On Wednesday, I took the day off work, had some car maintenance done, and received a relaxing facial. Later, Lydia and I went to dinner at Texas Roadhouse with a friend. Dave always enjoyed that restaurant, and my friend and I hadn’t been there in years – perhaps since we last went with Dave!

Lydia had her last orchestra concert this week, and I am happy to report she will continue next year. In fact, she tried out for chamber orchestra at her school and made the cut! I look forward to more orchestra concerts in the future! Lydia has made several new friends this year. There are only about ten violists are in her grade, and she said they are all pretty close. I love her confidence!

Work went well, and we had some important meetings about good changes ahead. However, I also took off yesterday since Lydia got sick right before school. Thankfully, I was still home to help her! I will have to catch up on work next week, but I am glad to have the ability to be there for Lydia, too!

Lydia and I finished our screens, and they turned out really well. I was able to clean all the windows and windowsills, which was probably a good thing anyway! Then, this morning, I finally reinstalled the screens. Overall, it was easier than I expected, but still a drawn-out process (about a month!). I could do the other windows around the house, but I don’t really want to!

The weather was great this week, with cooler, wet mornings and warm/hot afternoons. I mowed the lawn last night between potential rain showers, and it took me two hours because I bagged the grass (twice as long as usual). But the yard looks good, making the effort worth it! The little blue and white tree swallows are back and sitting on my deck to survey “their” domain. It has been fun to see them flitting around.

Speaking of birds, I also saw a downy woodpecker this week! I took a walk on my lunchbreak and was so surprised to see it! It was so cute and the highlight of my day.

I am still sore from all the work last night, so I am really glad I could relax today! I made some banana muffins, and Lydia had a friend over. They are in viola classes together, and she seems really sweet. Otherwise, it’s just been routine Saturday things!

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These are only a few examples, but God’s grace never runs out!

There’s grace in every situation—we just need to look for it. God promises if we seek Him, we will find Him (see Jeremiah 29:13)!

Staying Power

Today, Lydia and I are celebrating eleven years of Dave being in Heaven. As you can imagine, the month or two leading up to this day can be a little heavy. I try not to think about it much, but I can’t help it. I know it’s coming.

I tend to get a little emotional, which might show up as a soft, sensitive heart or with a short temper (not my usual!). I might get fired up or not care at all. It kind of depends on the day and the circumstances.

Typically, I am known for being steady and reliable. The one who shows up and follows through. But, during this brief period, I tend to do whatever it takes to keep moving forward.

Generally, that means pulling back from unnecessary activities to focus on what is. ‘No’ is a wonderful word! I used to apologize and try to explain, but this year, I have allowed myself not to worry about it. It has been a relief to show up as I am that day and be present.

It is funny how that has turned out. I have more energy, which has led to more courage to speak up about what matters and wisdom to let the other stuff go. I have been in tune with Jesus and have come into more of my own. His joy is my secret weapon and strength!

Reflecting on all this, I am grateful for all God has done. He has caught me, carried me, and sustained me. Right away, I knew I wanted to stay in Fargo, at least until Lydia was old enough to understand what happened. Moving is a lot of work, and I also wanted her to have closure.

Moving closer to family would have been easier, and maybe we will someday. But, for now, we are here. In the meantime, staying has meant asking for help and seeking God’s provision. He is the faithful One draws us close. There’s no place I’d rather be.

Years ago, I was inspired by various widows, such as Elisabeth Elliot and, later, Huldah Buntain, a missionary to India. When their husbands tragically died, they chose to stay where God had planted them, offering themselves to His work. I had my own reasons, but I have also seen God’s blessing in and through my life. I am so glad we stayed.

Staying put has helped me stay in-step with Jesus. This means going at His slower pace, not racing ahead or dragging my feet. As I wait on Him, I know when to move and when to rest. I have to lay aside daily distractions to ensure I can hear His voice and understand where He is leading me. After all, He holds me together (Colossians 1:17)!

While we often miss Dave and talk about him, we rejoice for the time we had with him. We are grateful that God has us in a good spot. Work is going well, and Lydia is thriving in school. We don’t know the future, but we know the best is yet to come. As we rest in Jesus’ presence, we rely on His staying power to see us through.

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God, thanks for Your grace and faithfulness all these years. You are so good to me, my All-In-All, always protecting me and providing for me. Help me keep moving forward. In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Questions: Whose power are you relying on? How is that working for you? Are you living in your own limited strength or relying on the infinite, unmatchable power of Almighty God, the Creator of the Universe?

Tasks: When you want to run away from your emotions or problems, run directly to Jesus. His name means Salvation. He can handle all the craziness, but you have to bring it to Him!

Finding Grace #427

You may have seen the acronym GRACE as God’s Riches At Christ’s Expense. Grace is also God’s unmerited favor, or God doing for us what we cannot.

I find grace overflowing with God’s love, joy, peace, blessings, mercy, power, provision, protection, and wisdom. Thank You, Jesus!

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Where did I find God’s love and favor—His abundant grace—this week?!

This was a good week. I am grateful it was a fairly normal week of work and school.

The weather has been absolutely perfect this week. We were able to take some walks together. We noticed some pretty flowering trees, bunnies, birds, and more. I enjoyed hearing Lydia’s chatter about all she has been thinking about lately.

Work went well, and I had a bit of downtime this week. I had a couple of cancellations and used that time to chart and catch up, which was nice. I also took a short walk outside a few days during lunch. Taking those breaks helped clear my mind, and I felt more productive in the end.

My house projects are still in process, but my neighbor came to help remove the screens so I can replace them. It looks fairly easy, but I might need Lydia to give me an extra hand.

This week, the biggest surprise was seeing the Northern Lights (the picture above is from Pixabay, an online repository, not mine)! Last night, I stayed up late and went out to the countryside for the best lightshow in twenty years. I had never seen two colors before. Glorious! Lydia was at a sleepover but sent me some of her pictures, too. I’m glad she thought they were cool!

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These are only a few examples, but God’s grace never runs out!

There’s grace in every situation—we just need to look for it. God promises if we seek Him, we will find Him (see Jeremiah 29:13)!

A Secret Weapon

The last couple of weeks have been a bit…maddening. I’ve lost my temper once or twice and been a little grouchy. Some of it could be subconsciously being aware that the eleventh anniversary of Dave’s death is next week. But really, things have just built up.

At home, unexpected issues have popped up, including trouble replacing my screens after getting egged and picking up a ton of dog poop from my yard (though I don’t have a dog). Then, the fence at the edge of my property fell again (after a two-year fight to get it put back up). It’s just been a lot lately.

I’ve been tempted to have a little pity party, thinking things would be easier if Dave were still here. While that may be true, I know life is full of problems, so even then, something else would likely happen unexpectedly! I can be grateful my problems are not worse, and I know many people are facing greater trials.

Work has been busy as usual, too. Good, just not much downtime to think straight. LOL Thus, my patience has been a little short, but I have been trying to bring all these things to Jesus. I talked with my mom yesterday, and she reminded me that His joy is my strength!

“Rejoice always, pray continually, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.” — 1 Thessalonians 5:16-18, NIV

I recently heard Jesus was the most joyful person who has ever lived. In His presence is fullness of joy (Psalm 16:11)! But He also had a very difficult life. He was born to suffer and die at my expense (and yours!). If Jesus can have abundant joy despite His circumstances, so can I.

Joy is a fruit of the Holy Spirit, which means He wants to grow that in me. The seed has been planted, I just need to cultivate it. This goes for love, peace, patience, etc.

Fruit is meant to be shared with others, to refresh and encourage them, similar to grace. As my mom pointed out, God wants people to see Him in us, so how we display the fruits of the Spirit matters. This is a good reminder to keep looking for ways to serve others and take the focus off myself.

Here are some questions to consider: Do I show joy or grouchiness on my face? Do I bring love and peace to a situation or chaos? Am I loving, kind, and patient even when I don’t get my way? Do I call out the good in others? Do I speak gentle words or bring wrath? Am I faithful even when it costs me? Do I show self-control when life flings out of control?

While I don’t expect my house issues to suddenly disappear, I know they will all work out in time. And I can choose to enjoy life in the meantime. I can find fun and creative things to do, or at least look for ways to bring joy into small moments of my day. Joy is my secret weapon as I stay close to Jesus, for therein lies my strength (Nehemiah 8:10).

When things feel out of control, I will take them to the One who controls the Universe and cares for me infinitely (1 Peter 5:7).

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God, thanks for the fruits of Your Holy Spirit. Specifically, help me cultivate more peace, joy, and patience as I work through these challenges. Thanks for all You do for me. In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Questions: Out of the nine fruits of the Holy Spirit, which ones do you need to cultivate the most right now?  (Galatians 5:22-23)

Task: Next time you feel bent out of shape, consider why. Do whatever it takes to protect your peace and joy. Remember, people are looking for Jesus in you!

Finding Grace #426

You may have seen the acronym GRACE as God’s Riches At Christ’s Expense. Grace is also God’s unmerited favor, or God doing for us what we cannot.

I find grace overflowing with God’s love, joy, peace, blessings, mercy, power, provision, protection, and wisdom. Thank You, Jesus!

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Where did I find God’s love and favor—His abundant grace—this week?!

This week was a little humbling. It went well overall, like usual, but there were a few things that made me take a second look at my heart.

I won’t go into all the details right now, but let’s just say I lost my temper a couple of times. I spent several hours doing several house projects and yard work. I mowed the yard, set out my deck furniture, swept the garage, and more. I am capable, but this is really not my preferred area of expertise. It all takes a lot of effort and emotional energy.

I also had a challenging meeting at work. I faced a situation where I did my best and did it very well. But, it was suggested I do something else to go in a different direction, which I pointed out really made no difference. It seemed nit-picky, and I was frustrated because there are so many “actually important” things to focus on, like patient care. It turned out well, but afterward, I did a heart check anyway.

I questioned my motives and wondered if I was just having difficulty accepting feedback. But I don’t think that’s it. After some prayer, I realized why I was bothered: I am trying to move away from perfection. So, trying to improve something that really doesn’t need to be fixed seemed futile (there was nothing wrong to begin with!). In all, it was eye-opening for me, and I am glad I spoke up.

This week was also a big week for parenting. Just normal things, nothing too crazy. Lydia is a great kid, and I enforce good boundaries and respect. I am so proud of her and work to shaper her character, which sometimes takes some big discussions and discipline.

Today, Lydia and I put out a few items on the curb for “clean-up week.” A lot of it was good stuff but just not worth keeping or selling. It’s fun to see which items are already gone before garbage day next week! Lydia and I also threw some other items in the attic. She thought the space above the garage was so cool!

Needless to say, it feels like a long week. I took a nice bath and am watching a movie tonight. Thanks, Lord, for Your mercy and grace!

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These are only a few examples, but God’s grace never runs out!

There’s grace in every situation—we just need to look for it. God promises if we seek Him, we will find Him (see Jeremiah 29:13)!

Stubborn

I recently had similar conversations with two people about stubbornness as a character trait. Of course, we talked mostly in generalities, not identifying ourselves as stubborn! 😉

We all agreed that stubbornness can be a positive or negative trait, depending on the context. One form of stubbornness comes with perseverance in trials, where one simply pushes ahead and refuses to give up. This may include certain military leaders, parents fighting for their children, or someone seeking justice. (Stubbornness does not mean staying put in an abusive situation. Do what you can to leave and get help!)

That said, sometimes, stubbornness is a refusal to compromise or work with others. In that sense, stubbornness can hold one back. The Bible refers to stubbornness as rebellion. The Israelites rejected God and were referred to as a stiff-necked people! Yikes.

Naturally, someone can be stubborn and experience both situations at different times. In fact, many character traits can be strengths or weaknesses depending on circumstances. For instance, confidence taken to an extreme can become arrogance!

After those two conversations, I kept thinking about stubbornness. How do you tell if stubbornness propels you forward or holds you back?

The first thing that comes to mind is… your heart. Are you seeking the benefit of others? Are you standing on strong principles? Are you willing to compromise if certain conditions are met? Or, is your heart hardened by fear or pride? Are you stalling for personal gain?

I’m sure there are some other factors to consider, but for the sake of brevity, I encourage you to start with those questions above. If you are dragging your feet, maybe consider why and work through it with Jesus.

Jesus made you for a purpose. Whether or not you are stubborn, He already knows. I guarantee He has good plans for you. He can use all of your personality traits for His glory and your good! Don’t let resistance or quirks keep you from Jesus!

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God, thanks for making each of us unique. Help us understand our strengths and weaknesses so we may bless others and bring you glory. In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Questions: Do you consider yourself to be stubborn? Why or why not? How is this a positive, and when does it become a negative?

Tasks: God gives each of us time to get to know Him, but He will not wait forever. If you have not chosen to submit your life and heart to Jesus, now is the perfect opportunity. Don’t wait!

Finding Grace #425

You may have seen the acronym GRACE as God’s Riches At Christ’s Expense. Grace is also God’s unmerited favor, or God doing for us what we cannot.

I find grace overflowing with God’s love, joy, peace, blessings, mercy, power, provision, protection, and wisdom. Thank You, Jesus!

Free Flowers Tulips photo and picture

Where did I find God’s love and favor—His abundant grace—this week?!

This week was good and fairly normal.

The weather was mixed with some warmer and cooler days and a bit of sun, wind, and rain. It has been a pretty Spring so far, and I am glad to see the green grass and buds on the trees. I will probably have to mow next week, though it will be sooner than I ever have while living in North Dakota!

As I mentioned on Wednesday, my house was egged this week. I am grateful for the help of neighbors, and I still need to look into getting a new screen. If it is not too much work, I might rescreen all the windows in the front part of my house. That way, they all look clean and fresh again.

School and work went well this week. I had some great conversations with many of my coworkers, but overall, there’s nothing too important to report. It was nice and peaceful!

Today has also been a fairly calm day. I have done a few little projects, but I have mostly been talking on the phone, watching Bible archaeology videos by Appian Media, and reading. It is a welcome chance to relax.

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These are only a few examples, but God’s grace never runs out!

There’s grace in every situation—we just need to look for it. God promises if we seek Him, we will find Him (see Jeremiah 29:13)!

Egging Me On

If you make lemonade when life gives you lemons, what do you do when life gives you eggs? Make an omelet? Write a blog post perhaps?

Yesterday, we woke up and realized our house had been egged overnight! One egg made it through the window screen, breaking it, and the other landed short. Blech.

I think it was just a random prank. Either way, I told Lydia to ignore it so it did not draw any extra attention among her fellow students. That age group is already tough, and I didn’t want give them any ideas!

Unfortunately, I had to leave the yucky mess so I wasn’t late for work, which meant it was baked in the bright sun by the time I returned home.
Free Egg Cracked photo and picture
But thankfully, within minutes of posting on social media, three neighbors offered to help out. One offered to supply a patch for my busted screen, one reviewed his outside camera, and one offered to pressure wash the area for me.
After work, I cleared out the egg yolks and eggshells inside the window. Then, a fourth neighbor and his son actually came over to help. They brought a ladder and used my hose, along with some scrubbing, to clean what they could of the outside portion of the window and siding. He understood what to do because his house was egged about a year ago. Thanks, Lord, for good neighbors who look out for me!
I should probably replace the screen because, even with a patch, it’s pretty beat up. It still smells eggy, too, so maybe I’ll borrow the power washer afterall! But, I am grateful that the damage wasn’t too bad overall. In terms of pranks, we fared pretty well. And, I am pleased that no one messed with my little free library, which has easy access in my front yard. It could have been much worse.
As I thought about my neighbors’ kindness, I was reminded of the Bible verse in Hebrews 10:24, which says, “And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds…”
My paraphrase could read: Let’s egg each other on to keep loving, encouraging, and serving…. 🙂
Now, I would not recommend defiling someone’s house, but maybe you could bring them dinner or offer to watch their kids when they are in a pinch. You could invite someone over for coffee and eggs brunch or help with yardwork when they are sick.
It doesn’t take much to make a difference—a smile, gift card, hug, or prayer go a long way. Bonus points if you do something practical. Yesterday, it was reviewing a camera reel and offering a screen patch, pressure washer, and a ladder. Whatever you have to offer is enough.
In fact, I have found that doing something is usually better than doing nothing! Even doing something “late” is better than skipping it altogether.
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God, thanks for all You do for me. Thanks for your protection and provision. Help me a good neighbor, having the wisdom to know what to do and the courage to do it. In Jesus’ Name, Amen
Questions: Have you ever been pranked?! How can you bless someone else today?
Tasks: Next time you see or hear of a need, offer to help. Even if you don’t know what to do, show up and be willing to serve. It may be in your wheelhouse or outside your comfort zone. Don’t worry about it; just do your best. I guarantee it will mean so much.