I’m thankful for the scars
‘Cause without them I wouldn’t know Your heart
And I know they’ll always tell of who You are
So forever I am thankful for the scars
So forever I am thankful for the scars

–From the song, “Scars,” by I AM THEY

Well, here we are in the middle of May! Today marks 6 years since Dave died. I am reflective, and a little sad, but I know it will pass. Today also marks six years of being a widow and single mom. Lydia and I are doing well, and talk about Dave often. 

Thankfully, we have found a good rhythm. God has us on a good path, and I’m grateful for the peace and rest He brings. Over the years, grief always felt like a ‘big’ factor. Now, it comes and goes with less frequency.

On this anniversary, we always celebrate Dave’s life by doing something special. I give Lydia a small gift, tell her “Dave stories,” and point out qualities of his that she also has.

When I asked Lydia for her ideas on how to celebrate, she suggested we eat frozen yogurt, play a game, or take a bike ride after we get home from work and school.

I’m amazed that she takes it all in stride. She has proven quite resilient! She seems fairly mature for her age, handling herself and her emotions well.

In fact, over the last few months, Lydia has started to ask for more details about Dave and cancer. She now identifies when she is sad, and we are able to talk about it. It helps that we can build on all our previous conversations.

Last week, Lydia decided on a whim to wear her CAT sweatshirt from when she was a toddler. It made me smile because the shirt is still so special to her. She didn’t think anything of the fact that is too small. The sleeves are super short, so maybe I’ll get her a new one for the fall!

Today, I’m also celebrating God’s grace and faithfulness. He has helped me to persevere and keep moving forward. Overall, I’ve made slow and steady progress, but it still counts!

We can’t get through life without pain and suffering. It’s just not possible to be alive and problem-free at the same time. We will all go through trials, which will likely yield some physical and/or emotional wounds. But, that doesn’t mean we have no control. We can certainly choose to have a good attitude and bring our pain to Jesus for healing. Professional therapy may also be helpful!

We should be wise with how we view our scars and stories. We don’t have to walk around showing off our scars to everyone we meet. Despite what happens, we are not victims. Besides, some people won’t understand our pain or be able to handle it appropriately.

But when we have the opportunity, we can use our scars to tell a story of grace, victory, and God’s goodness. Scars show how much we’ve been through, yes, but they also show how much we’ve been healed. Praise God!

Our trials, wounds, and scars can either distract us from Jesus or redirect us back to Him. I’m grateful I’ve chosen to draw near to the Lord. He has rebuilt me from the inside out, and His joy has been my strength. He is always with me and for me. He has never let me down!

Over the last six years, I’ve been constantly reminded life is so short. We can’t take anything for granted, but we can always be grateful. When we let God lead us, He takes such good care of us. He loves us so very much. Thank You, Jesus!

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God, thanks for bringing us this far. We could not have made it without You. Please continue to lead and guide us. Thank You for using my pain and scars and for giving me a new purpose. I give You glory. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.

Question: How do you like to celebrate the lives of your loved ones who have died?

Tasks: Listen to the song, “Scars,” by I AM THEY. Also, reach out to a widow, single mom, or someone else who may need some encouragement today! Small acts of kindness can go a long way!