Category: Wisdom

Posted on in Fear, Faith, and Moving Forward book, Gratitude, Journey of Grace, Kindness, Life is Short, Miscellaneous, Perseverance, Wisdom, Worship

Forty-Year Tune-Up!!

Woohoo! In a couple of days, I am celebrating my fortieth birthday! That sounds a little crazy because I still feel like I am twenty-five!

My thirties started off with Dave being sick and then dying, so the majority of that decade was dedicated to processing my grief and making sense of my new life as a widowed, single mom.

I learned how resilient I am and what it means to cling to Jesus. I quickly realized there are no shortcuts when it comes to emotional healing. You have to put in the effort, be willing to accept help, and let God carry you sometimes. The only way through is through.

One big part of processing my grief was writing about my journey here. So thanks for reading, praying, and cheering me on! I appreciate you all.

I also spent a significant amount of my thirties writing and editing my book, Fear, Faith, and Moving Forward. It was a labor of love, and I am proud that I finally pulled it off! I am beyond pleased with how my book turned out, and I really appreciate the continued support and feedback. Thank you!!

In short, my thirties were rough at times, but I learned to roll with the punches. God was reliable and gracious. He lead me to higher ground and has let me help others through their grief. I can’t thank Him enough!

Free illustrations of Watercolour flowers

Over the last year, I have been learning how to take better care of myself. This is an ongoing thing, which includes continuing to chase seven or eight hours of sleep, exercise consistently, and eating well. That’s all great currently, but in a couple of weeks things will shift again as we acclimate to the new school schedule. That’s life, right?!

This year, I went to the doctor for my toe (of all things, lol!). Later, I went for my routine physical and a couple of new tests. I found a chiropractor I love and now have a lot less pain, too! It’s like I have had a forty-year tune-up! 🙂

Really, I look at it as setting myself up for success. Not everything can be prevented, but I want to do what I can. That said, you can do ‘everything right,’ and something wild comes from out of left field. But, we can learn to trust God no matter what.

While I have been working hard, I have also been learning to rest more in God’s grace. Thankfully, He is patient with me! I am excited to see where He leads and how He continues to provide for me. He has never let me down!

Lately, I find myself smiling and laughing a lot. I have found joy in clarifying my priorities. It’s a balance of finding ways to care for myself and others, including Lydia. This also includes letting go of what doesn’t serve me anymore and not taking myself so seriously!

Over these last few weeks, I have enjoyed looking back and seeing God’s faithfulness. I am grateful for the Victories He has given me over these forty years, and especially the last ten years. He is so good!

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God, thanks for an amazing forty years! This is just a flash of time to You, but You are so kind to let me walk with You. Thanks for taking care of all that concerns me. Help me walk with more grace and joy in this new decade! In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Questions: How has God been good to you so far this year? What Victories do you see?

Tasks: Take a few minutes to reflect on how far God has brought you in the last few months or years. Write it down so you can remember it! (It’s easy to forget otherwise!)

Posted on in Gratitude, Kindness, Miscellaneous, Perfectionism, Perseverance, Personality, Wisdom, Worship

As Close As You Want To Be

Three separate, somewhat random sayings came to me yesterday morning while I was getting ready for work.

You are only as close to God as you want to be.

If you want what they have, are you willing to do what they did to get it?

Comparison is the thief of joy.

Free photos of Flowers

Here’s the short backstory: I was thinking about a picture I saw recently filled with some great people I don’t know very well… Well, this is off to a good start, right?!

Even though I have tried to get to know them better at various times, we just run in different social circles. I’m sure it’s nothing personal, and they are kind when we happen to run into each other. They are just busy serving God and going about their days, as am I. 

Still, for a split second, I started to compare my walk with God with how I perceived theirs must be. Perhaps they pray more or read their Bible more… If I were more spiritual, maybe I could… 

STOP. Thankfully, I nixed that game before it got out of hand!

While each of the three phrases is noteworthy on its own, yesterday, they somehow all seemed to converge together. For me, they felt like a personal reminder, or perhaps a timely challenge. So here goes!

Free photos of Rose

You are only as close to God as you want to be. God is never far from us, though sometimes we feel like He is nowhere to be found. The good news is that’s simply not true. Our emotions can change quickly, but the Lord is always faithful, steady. Nonetheless, connecting with God takes time, effort, and intention. Thankfully, He is infinitely patient and wise. Yes, God makes Himself known to those who seek Him and want to know Him.

Gut check: Are you just skimping by on quick, little prayers and random online Bible quotes, or are you really digging deep into God’s Word? Do you come to Jesus several times a day, or just on Sunday mornings? Do you run to Him first, or as a last resort?

If you want what they have, are you willing to do what they did to get it? This one could be a bit convicting, though it doesn’t have to be. Perhaps those people are praying more than me or reading their Bibles more than me. That’s wonderful… if it’s true. I really can’t know for sure, and I am not responsible for them. Besides, I don’t know all the sacrifices they have had to make!

I am only in charge of what God has put on my plate, and I can rest in that freedom. When I consider all that is, well, He must think I am pretty capable. I don’t have it all together, but neither do the people in that photo. The little I know them, I’m pretty sure they would agree.

Gut check: I can only do my best, but am I actually doing my best? Or could I do better? Spiritually, how does this look? Am I willing to sacrifice more, or do I need to be content with my resources and limitations?

Free photos of Dahlia

And finally… Comparison is the thief of joy. This adage is so true. Thankfully, I caught those thoughts and bent them toward making me better, not bitter.

Of course, life isn’t automatically easy for anyone. Perhaps the grass is greener on the other side because they are watering the grass. Or, perhaps God decided to bless them with rain, so they could focus on other things He has asked them to do. Both situations require a decent amount of God’s grace, plus a good deal of faith and a whole lotta elbow grease. 

Gut check: Am I spending adequate time with Jesus, letting Him be my all in all? Am I being obedient and walking in peace? Or am I getting sidetracked with sin and/or envy? 

Ultimately, I don’t have to compare my life or walk with Jesus to anyone else’s. I just need to stay close to Jesus and walk humbly with Him, grateful for where I am at this moment. He is so good and has good things in store for me!!

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God, thanks for all the wonderful ways You have blessed me. Help me not take You for granted, but put You above all else. Help me have a good attitude, think the best of others, and do what you have called me to do. In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Questions: Which of those phrases stood out to you today? How can you apply them in your life?

Task: If you are feeling far away from the Lord, reconnect with Him this very moment! He draws close to those who draw close to Him (James 4:8). Don’t delay; just come as you are!

Posted on in Being Gracious, Fear/Don't Fake Brave, Journey of Grace, Kindness, Life is Short, Miscellaneous, Perseverance, Prayer, Wisdom

Comfort Amid Grief

Sometimes you are in the right place at the right time, and sometimes, that place is church! This past Sunday, I had a God moment at church that I want to share with you.

About a year ago, I met a woman and her husband. They had been watching online through much of COVID, but I met them the first Sunday they decided to “try out” our church in person.

They were really sweet, and I was glad to meet them. Flash forward to the present, and the husband’s dementia has progressed. He is now in a nursing home, about an hour and a half away. His dear wife visits him every other day, though he does not fully recognize her.

I have encouraged this wife whenever I see her; she has become a friend. Though my experience was with cancer, I know how it feels to be a caregiver and decision maker in an end-of-life situation. Watching your beloved spouse decline is difficult, and I have been cheering her on.

So, when I saw this lady on Sunday, I stopped to greet her after the service. She was so happy to see me and shared how she had been struggling. I affirmed her statement that she is already grieving, though her husband is still alive. I agreed with her sentiment that she hopes he “goes soon” rather than have this continue over months or years. (Either way, we know he is in God’s hands and that his suffering is not in vain.)

I listened while my friend conveyed her lack of motivation. In these challenging times, I confirmed it is normal to need to get groceries but feel overwhelmed leaving the house; or, to finally prepare a meal but have no desire to eat it.

She mentioned she keeps forgetting about a support group at the VA (where I work), and I coached her with some tips. Marking her calendar in advance, while she is thinking about it, might help her not feel surprised whenever she gets a same-day reminder.

I also offered to help connect her with someone at the VA who could help guide her through the funeral and cemetery details (when the time comes). As she talked it through, she started to smile, and I could see her burden was lifted a little.

I gave this dear woman a big hug, and she just fell into my arms. I prayed for her on the spot, and she just melted in surrender. Not that my words were so deep, in fact, they were rather simple, but she felt seen and understood. She said it was just what she needed.

We only talked for a few minutes after the service, but it felt like a God-ordained moment for both of us. I am grateful He has used my story and experiences to help and guide others along the way.

I was reminded that we don’t JUST go to church to worship God but to be His hands and feet. My friend said, “And to think, I wasn’t even feeling up to coming today. I was going to stay home and watch online. But now, I am so glad I came.”

2 Corinthians 1:4, NLT, says that God “comforts us in all our troubles so that we can comfort others. When they are troubled, we will be able to give them the same comfort God has given us.”

During the well-timed sermon, our pastor mentioned this all is like a game of tag. God comforts us…and then it’s our turn to comfort others with the peace, strength, and grace He has given us. Tag! You’re it!

So, don’t discount your story or experiences. God can use all your pain, grief, and life’s ups and downs to make something beautiful… if you let Him!

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God, thanks for my friend. Would You please encourage, strengthen, and comfort her? Please meet her needs (spoken and unspoken) and remind her of Your grace and love. In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Questions: Have you seen God at work in your life story? Have you seen Him use your pain and grief in someone else’s life?

Task: Listen to this song! God will never fail you, no matter what.

Posted on in Kindness, Life is Short, Miscellaneous, Perseverance, Personality, Pivot, Wisdom

Stay the Course

If you are ready to give up, give in, throw in the towel, or put a fork in it (you’re done), this post is for you! There are so many things coming at us every day. Life sure is chaotic at times! If you are feeling drained, keep reading!

Some internal factors include the daily stress of getting out the door or getting everything done. Then, add in pain, grief, loneliness, anxiety,  PTSD, financial issues, or chronic health conditions, etc.

Externally, everything from the news to the weather counts. Every week, it seems we keep getting hit by one horrible tragedy after another. Wars, famine, violence, death, and more. These are very real problems with no clear solution.

On a smaller level, work is time-consuming (at the least) and relationships can be messy. It’s tough to gain momentum. Life is tough, no doubt, and it may not get easier any time soon.

Free illustrations of Big bang

Perhaps you are simply tired of waiting for things to change. It’s easy to get antsy or even bored, tired of the same old problems. You’re all ready to pivot toward the new and shiny, but wait! You may not fully understand the problems that come with those gains (because you know there will be problems and challenges, there too!).

Yes, sometimes we crave busyness and excitement, but when we have that we crave the calm of peace and quiet. Generally, it is good to be content wherever we are right now. Though, sometimes God does use discontent to get us on board with the next steps.

Either way, I want to challenge you today: Stay the course. If you are waiting for life to fall into place, you are in good company. I understand your frustration when it seems your prayers have gone nowhere, but God has not forgotten you! You can still choose to enjoy life today.

Maybe He has you in a holding pattern, just a little longer to finishing preparing you or the next set of circumstances. You can keep serving with joy where you are now. All around us people need His love and help!

The problem is we feel like it’s all on us. Some of us work day in and day out to get ahead. But, as Christ-followers, we walk by faith, which means trusting even when we can’t see the path before us. By faith, stay the course and stay close to God.

If you don’t know what to do, stay put. Don’t move until God says to move. If you don’t know what’s next, seek His input. That alone can save you a lot of heartache… and time, if you have to undo mistakes.

If you’re struggling with patience, remember that’s a fruit of the Holy Spirit. He put it in you and wants to cultivate it in your life! You are not alone in your struggle. Let Him help!

If you recall, STRESS can be an acronym for “Still Trying to Run the Entire Solar System.” But, remember, the One who created the stars and calls them by name also made you on purpose and knows you personally.

Just like God hung the stars and guides them, if you let Him, He will guide you, too. He has a wonderful plan for your life, and He is able to redirect you as needed. Stay the course.

God never grows tired or weary, so He’s always got your back. He cares about what concerns you, more than you could ever know. What God has for you, is for you.

As long as you are walking close in step with Him, God Almighty will make sure you get all that He has for you. You don’t have to be afraid of missing out. He is trustworthy and your life is not a small thing to Him… You are covered in His mercy and grace!

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God, You hold all things together in Christ, from outer space to a teeny-tiny ant hill! Thanks for holding my life together, too. You are so good, Lord. Help me trust You more with all the challenges in my life. Jesus’ Name, Amen

Questions: Are you dealing with S.T.R.E.S.S.?? How can you trust God with it all today?

Tasks: Make a list of all that is bothering you, or the pros and cons of a specific situation. Then, look at it in light of God’s grace and goodness. Wait on Him, and see Him work it out on your behalf. Trust Him!

Posted on in Being Gracious, Fear/Don't Fake Brave, Gratitude, Kindness, Life is Short, Miscellaneous, Pivot, Wisdom, Worship

Pivot

It’s only the middle of the week, but already it has been jam-packed with God’s grace! I have had so many connections with people, including family, friends, and Veterans.

Almost all of the conversations, however, have been unplanned. It always seems these types of things go in spurts. I usually have fairly routine interactions with people, but sometimes they go into overdrive! I’ve had heartfelt conversations with family and coworkers and some breakthrough sessions with patients.

This week, I also met with a recently widowed mom from church. She reached out and just needed a little direction. She has been reading my book, and I am so glad God is using my painful grief experiences to help her. We went to dinner and had so much fun! I’m sure we will do it again soon.

In order to meet with this friend, though, I had to figure out what to do with Lydia last minute. Thankfully, she had been with another family that day (for an art class and swimming), so she was able to stay a little longer with them. She ate dinner with them and attend one of their son’s baseball games. Whew!

It takes a village, and I was grateful. God organized all the details for me, so I could do what He wanted me to do. I also have made plans with a couple of other friends and families later in the week. Summer is in full swing!

Over and over, this week, it seems like I have been in the right place at the right time. It’s cool how when God does something big in our lives (or those we know), it helps others have faith, too. They see a breakthrough and trust Him for greater things in their lives!

Free photos of Dortmund hbf

I usually try to be flexible, as much as I can, so I am available to serve those around me. But, sometimes it bites me. What I mean is that I try to bend in so many ways, that I can’t meet everyone’s needs or timing. Either I stress about it or I have to say no when someone needs help.

I have learned that’s okay. I don’t have to stand in God’s place! Only He can be all things to all people! I just have to be willing to pivot when God needs me. We can choose to have a good attitude and take it in stride, or we can drag our feet.

Isn’t God good to lead us? If we walk closely with Him and move when He needs us to move, we will never be out of step. He teaches us not only to pivot, but He also helps us navigate tricky situations. Sometimes that means repentance (confessing wrong choices and going the opposite direction) and sometimes it means opening up ourselves to new challenges and blessings.

In fact, you have likely had to make many pivots in the last two years alone. We’ve seen a wild collection of health issues, finances, politics, elections, and the economy!

But, remember this: A pivot is more than just fancy footwork. It opens up new opportunities and blessings! So, check your attitude and keep moving forward!

When plans change and we need to pivot, we also see God’s faithfulness. He is still in control and still at work in us and around us.

So, we don’t need to fear saying yes to God, and we don’t have to fear when He says no on our behalf. We can trust Him; He has us covered!

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God, thanks for working on our behalf and helping us pivot when needed. May we hear Your voice above all the chaos and even our own desires. Help us stay in step with You. In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Questions: Are you good at switching plans at a moment’s notice? Or is it more of a challenge for you to pivot?

Tasks: Next time you need to change last-minute plans, ask yourself whether God Himself is asking you to pivot. Let that process direct your attitude. Serve with gratitude that He has a bigger purpose!

Posted on in Gratitude, Life is Short, Miscellaneous, Perseverance, Wisdom

Protect, Provide, and Prepare

Once again, I have been thinking of all the ways God protects us. Sometimes we are aware of His mercy and grace but often we have no clue.

For instance, a while back, I was backing out of my parking space after work and was thinking about the upcoming errands for my evening. I braked and then saw the car parked directly behind me… in my rearview mirror. I did not get out to see just how close I was, but I could have easily hit the car if I had kept going in reverse.

I had no idea it was that close… obviously, I wasn’t paying attention because my mind was elsewhere. I do have a good backup camera, but since I park in a less busy lot, I didn’t put it all together that there would be a car “so close.” (All the other vehicles were nowhere near me.)

But I immediately thanked God and praised Him for watching out for me. He protected me and the other person’s car, too!

Free photos of Flower

Of course, God’s protection doesn’t always mean no trouble or lack of challenges. As you may recall, in May, I had someone my driver’s side mirror. But even then, God protected me and my car.

Thankfully, the damage was contained to only a small area. It could have been so much worse. Like if you’re going to have your car hit by someone, that’s the best possible scenario!

And, the other person paid for the damage that very day. It took about ten days to get it fixed, but I was able to drive it in the meantime. I could see God’s hand at work, even though I was unaware of how it all would play out. He is a good Provider!

That made me consider how many times God prepares us in advance for certain challenges. Only He could then uses those victories to build us up for the next challenge!

Free photos of Lavenders

How does God protect, provide for, and/or prepare you? Three things come to my mind, but there are so many more! I’d love to know your thoughts, too!

1) God protects us from and prepares us for unknown circumstances. This might include getting a medical test for one reason and catching another illness early while it is still treatable. Note: It may not work that way for someone you know, but God is no less good. He is still in control and has a plan and purpose for the pain!

2) Sometimes, God steps in and stops or promotes a decision outside of your control. (Case in point: A few months ago, I faced a tough decision that was already made in my favor by the time I showed up.)

3) God protects us and prepares us by using the people in our lives, too. Some people rotate in and out, while some stick around. And some circle back at a different time! But, ultimately, He works these relationships out for our good, which often means growth and refining.

One final example: Last weekend, I needed to change a light bulb in the garage. It was a 48″ fluorescent one, and my arms don’t extend that far! I was three rungs up on a ladder and kept getting down to try another angle. Not my favorite thing! I had a hunch that Lydia would come find me and scare me by accident. Sure enough, I soon heard her on the other side of the door getting her shoes. Thank You, God, for the heads up!

So, I paused and called to her. She came outside and I reminded her to stay back. We then prayed that I could get the light in both sockets without falling. Praise God, I did it!

At the end of the day, there are countless ways God protects, provides for, and/or prepares us. Regardless of what happens in our lives, if we are on God’s side, we can trust He will work everything out for our good and His glory. That’s a promise in Romans 8:28!

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God, thanks for all Your goodness to us! Lord, we only see a small part of what You do every day. Lord, help us become aware as we learn to trust You more. In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Questions: What is one example of how God worked things out for you recently? Did He protect you outright or prepare you to walk through the challenge?

Tasks: Make a list of how God is working in your life lately! Listen to “For the Good,” by Riley Clemmons.

Posted on in Gratitude, Life is Short, Miscellaneous, Parenting, Wisdom, Worship

Keeping An Eternal Perspective

Lydia and I recently were talking about habits that are helpful versus habits that are not. We discussed seemingly benign ideas like playing games on her tablet, watching our favorite shows, and more.

Around this time, she also came up to me and exclaimed, “Mom, do you know how long eternity is? Forever!! I can’t even think how long that is!” Her mind was blown!

Sensing an opportunity to tie these things together, I steered our discussion toward the types of things we should be doing to prepare for eternity. Some examples would include reading our Bibles and learning Who Jesus is. We imagined what it would feel like showing up in Heaven not knowing anything about it, other than Jesus’ death and resurrection.

We agreed that want to make sure we know as much as we can now!

Free photos of Mountains

Soon, Lydia’s eyes lit up in understanding. Our lives are so brief in light of eternity. I told Lydia our current problems will someday seem very small and distant. Though it doesn’t feel that way in the stress of the moment!

That very night, she started rereading her Action Bible, which is a graphic novel version of the Bible highlighting key stories. I did remind her that it doesn’t have every story in it, so we need to make sure to read the real Bible, too.

I appreciate that the Action Bible brings the stories to life in a fun way. Lydia jumped straight to Revelation, as she has been fascinated by the Rapture and the great beast who brings horrible evil. This led us to briefly chat about how crazy this world is becoming. It’s good to know the signs of the times!

We also talked about faith versus works, and what that means for believers and unbelievers on Judgement Day. We all will have to give an account of our actions!

Then, in her actual Bible, Lydia somehow found the story of Elisha and the widow in 2 Kings 4. “Mom, I didn’t even know this story was in here!” We talked about how the widow followed through on Elisha’s command to collect jars from her neighbors to hold the oil. She was able to sell the oil and provide for her family. Our actions demonstrate our faith in what God can/will do!

It’s no surprise that Life can be complicated at times. We plan and prepare, yet still, our days get crazy and chaotic! It’s easy to get stuck on whatever problem is in front of us that day. How quickly we forget the bigger picture!

Sometimes we try to do it all on our own, forgetting that God is right there. If you find yourself spinning your wheels or hitting a wall, check back in with God. He is our peace.

Besides, Jesus told us not to worry because each day has its own troubles! So, it’s good to ask ourselves, “In light of eternity, does this matter?” As someone once told me, “It’s all gonna burn someday!” Let’s keep an eternal perspective as we go about our day.

Let the Holy Spirit instill you with His grace and strength. He is not only our Advocate and Comforter, but He is also our Teacher. He is preparing us for greater things, which absolutely includes Eternity!

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God, thank you for setting Eternity in our hearts. Help us live each day fully, walking in Your grace, truth, love, and peace. Help us keep the main thing the main thing. In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Questions: Are you prepared for Eternity? How can you stay close to Jesus today?

Task: Remember, the best way to succeed in Life is to stay close to God. Know Jesus, accept His sacrifice, death, and resurrection. Then, live for Him! (As always, reach out if you have questions or need some guidance on what this means for you!)

 

 

Posted on in Gratitude, Miscellaneous, Parenting, Perseverance, Wisdom

Incomparable

This week, I was showing Lydia a cute dog video online when a commercial popped up with a popular fitness brand (Company A) showcasing their gear. Of course, a trim model was using the fitness equipment and was dressed in a clingy outfit.

I was ready to move on to the next cute dog, but Lydia told me what she thought about Company A’s advertising. “Mom, they are using this skinny model to get people to buy their products.”

Her statement piqued my interest because I hadn’t expected her to be so aware. Naturally, I quizzed her a little. “What else do you think they are trying to say, Lydia?”

“If you buy this, you will be like her. If want to look like this, you have to buy this outfit and gear. There’s only one kind of acceptable person…. but of course, that’s not true.”

Free photos of Young woman

Then, Lydia mentioned another comparable brand with a slightly different focus. She said, “Company B uses people who are all shapes, sizes, and colors. Tall, short, black, white, and so on.”

I asked her if she picked up any other messages in their advertising. “You can be who you’re meant to be. You are unique and don’t have to look like everyone else. Healthy goes beyond how you look.”

“Lydia, I am impressed that you understand their marketing and can see what they really mean! Where did you learn all of this?”

She replied, “I learned that from you!” 🙂

We went on to discuss moving our bodies in healthy ways and feeding our bodies well so they will do what we need them to do. Thankfully, ‘healthy’ can mean something different for each of us!

I asked Lydia if she had a verse she wanted me to use since most of this blog post uses her words. I suggested Psalm 139 which says we are “fearfully and wonderfully made.”

She requested, “He’s the potter and we are the clay.” This comes from Isaiah 64:8 (above). I asked why she chose that verse, and Lydia explained, “God made you special so don’t envy others. He has a purpose and plan for you! Don’t compare yourself to others because you will be disappointed. It makes it worse.”

A ten-year-old doesn’t think about original context, but even so, she had a good application! My takeaway is this: Each of us is one-of-a-kind because God Himself is incomparable.

Only in Him do we find our purpose and meaning. He alone brings fulfillment and helps us live for Him. He is our joy and peace, so we can enjoy life without worry!

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God, thanks for making us each unique. You are so kind, generous, and wise! May we remember You have created us for purpose and meaning that can only be found in You. In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Questions: What is something that makes you unique? How can you bless someone with that trait?

Tasks: Instead of comparing yourself to others, consider why God made you different and how you can use those skills and characteristics to His glory.

Posted on in Gratitude, Journey of Grace, Life is Short, Miscellaneous, Parenting, Personality, Wisdom

Yes Day!!

Last Saturday, Lydia and I had a Yes day as we honored Dave’s ninth anniversary of being in Heaven (Sunday). She was so excited to call the shots! While we certainly miss him, we chose to celebrate instead of being sad.

To start, Lydia woke up at 6:50 a.m. which is pretty early for her on a Saturday! She asked if she could have a small cookie for breakfast. “Well… YES!!” I said. We never do that, so I wasn’t too worried about it.

While she ate her cookie, and I ate peanut butter toast, we finished a movie we started the night before. Then, we made a plan for the day. Lydia had a long list of things she wanted to accomplish!

Free vector graphics of Yes

Our first stop was PetSmart, just to look around. We saw some fish and some kittens for adoption. Next door, Lydia wanted to have a shopping spree at Michael’s. Thankfully, she had a gift card and was able to buy a couple of art organizers and some Washi tape.

Then, we went to Ulta because I had a gift card. (She cheerfully agreed to let me hijack her day.) As I looked around, Lydia found some blue fake stick-on nails. Not my fancy, but of course, I said yes!

After that, we ate lunch at Panera. We each had a You-Pick-Two salad and flat-bread pizza. I offered to share, but Lydia wanted her own. She laughed when I pointed out that we both took home leftovers!

The mall was next on her list. She wanted to go to a candy-and-toy store and Bath and Body Works. We also walked to one end to see the fountain and the other end to see some puppies. I asked if we could stop at the kitchen store for some chili-infused garlic oil and jalapeno lime vinegar. A patient told me about the combination, and I was not disappointed!

We made a few purchases at the mall before heading off for boba tea. I really didn’t want to try it, but I asked questions to help Lydia decide what to order. In the end, it sounded interesting after all! Lydia ordered a fruity tea with fruit bobas. I tried a tea with milk and ‘brown sugar boba’… a little hard to describe, but tasty! We each brought home our drinks to enjoy later.

We went home to regroup and put our leftovers away. We put on Lydia’s nails; the process was a little confusing at first but ended up being easy. We also attached some little charms to her Crocs. She was sooo happy and grateful!

We then headed out to a cookie dough and ice cream place. We decided to eat dinner at home first (leftovers) and saved our treats for later. Lydia ended up forgetting about hers in the freezer, which is fine by me. 😉 We ended the night by watching the new cartoon movie, “Bad Guys.” We liked it!

I loved spending time with my girl! The idea of a Yes day was based on a book and movie, where the parents say yes to every request (within certain parameters). I enjoyed seeing Lydia’s idea of fun and automatically agreeing to her plan. She already has ideas for whenever her next Yes day comes around!

As a parent, I spend a lot of time saying no, so it was different saying yes for a day. I was able to relax because I wasn’t automatically thinking of all the other things that needed to get done or why something wasn’t possible in the moment. “No, we have to get the laundry done first… No, you can’t do that right now… No, you don’t need another one of those…”

Bedtime ended up being where all of the day’s excitement hit the fan, so to speak. Lydia grew quiet and sad, missing Dave. This happens sometimes and I just roll with it as best I can, praying for wisdom along the way. We shared tears and her final request for a ten-minute massage seemed to help.

At some point in the day, I was reminded of the verse in 2 Corinthians 1:20, which says, “For no matter how many promises God has made, they are ‘Yes’ in Christ. And so through him, the ‘Amen’ is spoken by us to the glory of God.”

No matter how tough Life gets, God never lets us down. While He doesn’t always say YES to all of our requests, He is always working out the ultimate yes in Christ. We can trust Him to do what is best for us!

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God, You are so good. Thanks for always doing what is right for us. Even Your no is a yes in the end! Help us to trust You more. In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Question: When was the last time you set aside your to-do list or other expectations to have a yes day or a free day?!

Task: Here is the trailer to the movie, “Yes Day,” in case you want to check it out!

Posted on in Being Gracious, Fear/Don't Fake Brave, Gratitude, Kindness, Life is Short, Miscellaneous, Parenting, Personality, Prayer, Wisdom, Words

Bedtime Bombshells

Other children at bedtime: “I’m thirsty. It’s dark, I can’t sleep. I’m not ready for bed.”
 
My conscientious child: “Mom, can you set up these child protections because I keep wanting to use the iPad when I know I shouldn’t, and I don’t want to lie when you ask me about it.”
Thankfully, our nightly routine is a place of safety and trust! I don’t always feel prepared for these ‘bedtime bombshells,’ but I lean on God’s wisdom as I chat with Lydia.
(Regarding the tablet, I do monitor her usage, but together we decided this was a good opportunity to practice self-control, so we decided to try moving the tablet to make it less convenient and see if she is able to regulate herself. We will revisit the topic soon.)
Upon further discussion about why this was bothering her, Lydia said, “Well, Jesus can come back at any time, and I don’t want to be caught doing something that’s wrong.” This led to a great discussion about God’s grace and mercy, and the difference between the two!
 
Then, that led to questions about friends who swear and do other questionable things but say they go to church. These are not Lydia’s closest friends, though it really bothers her at times when they are disrespectful. “If they really knew God, would they act like that?”
Flowers, Plum Blossom, Spring, Petals, Seasonal, Bloom
We discussed that all of us have sinned and fall short of the glory of God (Romans 3:23). Jesus is the only Way to Heaven (John 14:6), and despite all the good or bad things we do, none of us are deserving. Perhaps Lydia’s friends are unaware of God’s love for them. One way to know God’s people is that they should become more like Him over time.
Then, Lydia said, “When I get to Heaven, I am going to ask God why He didn’t just start over and make everyone love Him?” We discussed how robotic love is not really love at all.
“Ah, well, God can do anything, so He could do that,” she said. I told her there are some things God cannot do such as lie. We have to listen to God’s voice so we are not misled by Satan’s lies and evil schemes. That’s why these conversations with her are so important!
She realized, “Wow, that’s right! I guess there’s no treadmill of love forcing everyone to love God and each other. We have to make a choice.”
We also discussed the ‘common grace’ that God gives to everyone to draw us closer to Him. Some examples include beautiful sunrises and nature, our conscience, laughter with family and friends, safety, etc. God wants each of us to know Him, so we should pray for all our friends and show them God’s love. Yes, it’s the kindness of God that leads us to repentance (Romans 2:4).
We discussed how some people are afraid of God, but they don’t need to be because He is love. Then, Lydia saying, “I bet they haven’t read Revelation!” Which, of course, led to an End Times discussion about the Rapture and the Antichrist! Lydia understands it is important to be prepared, yet she is also concerned for her friends who are unaware.
I am grateful for my wise and thoughtful girl! What an interesting conversation!
This coming weekend marks the ninth anniversary of Dave’s death and entrance into eternity. The conversations above are all the more important to me because (with God’s salvation and grace), it’s on me to make sure Lydia knows the Way to Heaven by pointing her directly to Jesus! In some ways, my goal is to finish what Dave and I started. 
When I think of the last nine years, I see both desperate struggle and overwhelming Victory. Praise God for carrying us this far. He cannot be anything but faithful and good to us, because that’s Who He is!
While I don’t know what’s going on in your life today, I do know God cares all about you and your problems. He is trustworthy and true, so bring Him your fears and concerns.
God can handle all your questions, too. Believe me, I know. Besides, He won’t make you run on an endless treadmill to earn His love!
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God, You are so faithful and good. Thanks for your lovingkindness to us! Help us spread Your love and grace to others. Help us show them Who You are. In Jesus’ Name Amen
Questions: What is your favorite Bible verse? Do you enjoy walking or running on a treadmill? If not, is there a different piece of exercise equipment you enjoy more?!
Tasks: Pray for your friends and family who don’t know Jesus. Set a good, loving example of Who He is… sometimes, we inadvertently turn them “off” because of how we act!