Category: Parenting

Posted on in Gratitude, Journey of Grace, Life is Short, Miscellaneous, Parenting, Personality, Wisdom

Yes Day!!

Last Saturday, Lydia and I had a Yes day as we honored Dave’s ninth anniversary of being in Heaven (Sunday). She was so excited to call the shots! While we certainly miss him, we chose to celebrate instead of being sad.

To start, Lydia woke up at 6:50 a.m. which is pretty early for her on a Saturday! She asked if she could have a small cookie for breakfast. “Well… YES!!” I said. We never do that, so I wasn’t too worried about it.

While she ate her cookie, and I ate peanut butter toast, we finished a movie we started the night before. Then, we made a plan for the day. Lydia had a long list of things she wanted to accomplish!

Free vector graphics of Yes

Our first stop was PetSmart, just to look around. We saw some fish and some kittens for adoption. Next door, Lydia wanted to have a shopping spree at Michael’s. Thankfully, she had a gift card and was able to buy a couple of art organizers and some Washi tape.

Then, we went to Ulta because I had a gift card. (She cheerfully agreed to let me hijack her day.) As I looked around, Lydia found some blue fake stick-on nails. Not my fancy, but of course, I said yes!

After that, we ate lunch at Panera. We each had a You-Pick-Two salad and flat-bread pizza. I offered to share, but Lydia wanted her own. She laughed when I pointed out that we both took home leftovers!

The mall was next on her list. She wanted to go to a candy-and-toy store and Bath and Body Works. We also walked to one end to see the fountain and the other end to see some puppies. I asked if we could stop at the kitchen store for some chili-infused garlic oil and jalapeno lime vinegar. A patient told me about the combination, and I was not disappointed!

We made a few purchases at the mall before heading off for boba tea. I really didn’t want to try it, but I asked questions to help Lydia decide what to order. In the end, it sounded interesting after all! Lydia ordered a fruity tea with fruit bobas. I tried a tea with milk and ‘brown sugar boba’… a little hard to describe, but tasty! We each brought home our drinks to enjoy later.

We went home to regroup and put our leftovers away. We put on Lydia’s nails; the process was a little confusing at first but ended up being easy. We also attached some little charms to her Crocs. She was sooo happy and grateful!

We then headed out to a cookie dough and ice cream place. We decided to eat dinner at home first (leftovers) and saved our treats for later. Lydia ended up forgetting about hers in the freezer, which is fine by me. 😉 We ended the night by watching the new cartoon movie, “Bad Guys.” We liked it!

I loved spending time with my girl! The idea of a Yes day was based on a book and movie, where the parents say yes to every request (within certain parameters). I enjoyed seeing Lydia’s idea of fun and automatically agreeing to her plan. She already has ideas for whenever her next Yes day comes around!

As a parent, I spend a lot of time saying no, so it was different saying yes for a day. I was able to relax because I wasn’t automatically thinking of all the other things that needed to get done or why something wasn’t possible in the moment. “No, we have to get the laundry done first… No, you can’t do that right now… No, you don’t need another one of those…”

Bedtime ended up being where all of the day’s excitement hit the fan, so to speak. Lydia grew quiet and sad, missing Dave. This happens sometimes and I just roll with it as best I can, praying for wisdom along the way. We shared tears and her final request for a ten-minute massage seemed to help.

At some point in the day, I was reminded of the verse in 2 Corinthians 1:20, which says, “For no matter how many promises God has made, they are ‘Yes’ in Christ. And so through him, the ‘Amen’ is spoken by us to the glory of God.”

No matter how tough Life gets, God never lets us down. While He doesn’t always say YES to all of our requests, He is always working out the ultimate yes in Christ. We can trust Him to do what is best for us!

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God, You are so good. Thanks for always doing what is right for us. Even Your no is a yes in the end! Help us to trust You more. In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Question: When was the last time you set aside your to-do list or other expectations to have a yes day or a free day?!

Task: Here is the trailer to the movie, “Yes Day,” in case you want to check it out!

Posted on in Finding Grace Weekly Recap, Gratitude, Journey of Grace, Miscellaneous, Parenting

Finding Grace #323

You may have seen the acronym GRACE as God’s Riches At Christ’s Expense. Grace is also God’s unmerited favor, or God doing for us what we cannot.

I find grace overflowing with God’s love, joy, peace, blessings, mercy, power, provision, protection, and wisdom. Thank You, Jesus!

Free photos of Flowers

Where did I find God’s love and favor—His abundant grace—this week?!

This was a great week!

Mother’s Day on Sunday was nice and relaxing. We enjoyed church and some rainy weather. Later in the afternoon some friends came to visit, and then we saw family over Zoom.

On Wednesday, we finished up our ladies group with a meal. The host brought most of the food, and I was blessed by her generosity. I hope to join up with the same ladies for another book study sometime!

Friday was quite busy after work. I bought some new shoes, returned some clothes for Lydia that didn’t fit, and bought some stain for my deck. I also did some grocery shopping and dropped off a small gift for a friend whose mom died that day. Then, I dropped Lydia off at another birthday party and ran some more errands!

Today, Lydia and I had a YES day as we honor Dave’s ninth anniversary of being in Heaven (tomorrow). She was so excited to call the shots! While we certainly miss him, we are choosing to celebrate instead of be sad. Thanks for your support!

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These are only a few examples, but God’s grace never runs out!

There’s grace in every situation—we just need to look for it. God promises if we seek Him, we will find Him (see Jeremiah 29:13)!

Posted on in Being Gracious, Fear/Don't Fake Brave, Gratitude, Kindness, Life is Short, Miscellaneous, Parenting, Personality, Prayer, Wisdom, Words

Bedtime Bombshells

Other children at bedtime: “I’m thirsty. It’s dark, I can’t sleep. I’m not ready for bed.”
 
My conscientious child: “Mom, can you set up these child protections because I keep wanting to use the iPad when I know I shouldn’t, and I don’t want to lie when you ask me about it.”
Thankfully, our nightly routine is a place of safety and trust! I don’t always feel prepared for these ‘bedtime bombshells,’ but I lean on God’s wisdom as I chat with Lydia.
(Regarding the tablet, I do monitor her usage, but together we decided this was a good opportunity to practice self-control, so we decided to try moving the tablet to make it less convenient and see if she is able to regulate herself. We will revisit the topic soon.)
Upon further discussion about why this was bothering her, Lydia said, “Well, Jesus can come back at any time, and I don’t want to be caught doing something that’s wrong.” This led to a great discussion about God’s grace and mercy, and the difference between the two!
 
Then, that led to questions about friends who swear and do other questionable things but say they go to church. These are not Lydia’s closest friends, though it really bothers her at times when they are disrespectful. “If they really knew God, would they act like that?”
Flowers, Plum Blossom, Spring, Petals, Seasonal, Bloom
We discussed that all of us have sinned and fall short of the glory of God (Romans 3:23). Jesus is the only Way to Heaven (John 14:6), and despite all the good or bad things we do, none of us are deserving. Perhaps Lydia’s friends are unaware of God’s love for them. One way to know God’s people is that they should become more like Him over time.
Then, Lydia said, “When I get to Heaven, I am going to ask God why He didn’t just start over and make everyone love Him?” We discussed how robotic love is not really love at all.
“Ah, well, God can do anything, so He could do that,” she said. I told her there are some things God cannot do such as lie. We have to listen to God’s voice so we are not misled by Satan’s lies and evil schemes. That’s why these conversations with her are so important!
She realized, “Wow, that’s right! I guess there’s no treadmill of love forcing everyone to love God and each other. We have to make a choice.”
We also discussed the ‘common grace’ that God gives to everyone to draw us closer to Him. Some examples include beautiful sunrises and nature, our conscience, laughter with family and friends, safety, etc. God wants each of us to know Him, so we should pray for all our friends and show them God’s love. Yes, it’s the kindness of God that leads us to repentance (Romans 2:4).
We discussed how some people are afraid of God, but they don’t need to be because He is love. Then, Lydia saying, “I bet they haven’t read Revelation!” Which, of course, led to an End Times discussion about the Rapture and the Antichrist! Lydia understands it is important to be prepared, yet she is also concerned for her friends who are unaware.
I am grateful for my wise and thoughtful girl! What an interesting conversation!
This coming weekend marks the ninth anniversary of Dave’s death and entrance into eternity. The conversations above are all the more important to me because (with God’s salvation and grace), it’s on me to make sure Lydia knows the Way to Heaven by pointing her directly to Jesus! In some ways, my goal is to finish what Dave and I started. 
When I think of the last nine years, I see both desperate struggle and overwhelming Victory. Praise God for carrying us this far. He cannot be anything but faithful and good to us, because that’s Who He is!
While I don’t know what’s going on in your life today, I do know God cares all about you and your problems. He is trustworthy and true, so bring Him your fears and concerns.
God can handle all your questions, too. Believe me, I know. Besides, He won’t make you run on an endless treadmill to earn His love!
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God, You are so faithful and good. Thanks for your lovingkindness to us! Help us spread Your love and grace to others. Help us show them Who You are. In Jesus’ Name Amen
Questions: What is your favorite Bible verse? Do you enjoy walking or running on a treadmill? If not, is there a different piece of exercise equipment you enjoy more?!
Tasks: Pray for your friends and family who don’t know Jesus. Set a good, loving example of Who He is… sometimes, we inadvertently turn them “off” because of how we act!
Posted on in Fear/Don't Fake Brave, Miscellaneous, Parenting, Perseverance, Personality, Wisdom, Words

On Encouraging Ourselves

Recently, Lydia and I have been watching a cute show on Netflix called, “Old Enough.” It’s about young Japanese children (ages two to around six or seven) going on “first errands” to help their families in some way.

The kids are not truly alone, as the camera crew is following them from a distance. But in most cases, the crew is not supposed to interact with the children. It is quite impressive to watch these adorable kids, but I cannot imagine us doing that in America!

On the show, we’ve watched a little boy take fish to the fishmonger; kids going to buy a few grocery items; prepare hot tea and a snack for the family; bring lunch to dad at work on the boat; or take flowers to grandma. Some have special handmade flags to help people see them cross the road and others just raise their hands high. Sometimes they walk and sometimes they run the whole way. They usually look both ways several times!

Boy, Picnic, Ruck Sack, Child, Walk, Japanese, Asian

Of course, there are often challenges with making decisions or trying something on their own. While errands and places are familiar, the little kids (toddlers, even!) don’t always know what to do. They aren’t sure which bus to ride (solo!!) or which brand to buy. Some of the kids ask for help reaching items or choosing between options, and some use old-fashioned ingenuity. Only a couple of little ones have wandered home sadly before going out to try again. Impressive!

As you can imagine, the child may not feel up to the task. After a little coaxing or a pep talk, they are on their way determined to make their family proud. Occasionally, the episode has two little friends working together. They keep each other on task and in line. Some are shy and some are extraverted, but they all figure it out in the end. They are heartwarming and adorable to watch!

What stands out to me is that all the kids encourage themselves along the way. On their way, they tell themselves all sorts of things such as, “I can do it. I am confident and determined. I’m brave. Let’s go! I am capable. This is fun. I’m smart! I did it! I’m tired, but I can rest at home. Mom will be happy with me!” One little girl even held her hand up to her ear like a phone and pretended to tell her mom how well she was doing!

If you haven’t already seen the show, “Old Enough,” I recommend it! Lydia has a fascination with Japan anyway, so the culture, religion, housing, and eating habits have been good talking points!

  I love how the kids on the show encourage themselves when they are afraid, lonely, or unsure. That’s because even as adults, we don’t always get it right! When we are hungry, afraid, lonely, tired, unsure, or under pressure, we tend to get off track. Our thoughts and emotions can lead us astray, so we assume the worst about ourselves or our situation!

Thankfully, we have a good example in the Bible because King David took a different approach. When he faced hardship, loss, and near-mutiny, he encouraged himself in the Lord (1 Samuel 30:6). He strengthened himself, not with his own laurels, but with God’s Word and promises to him.

Ultimately, there’s nothing wrong with encouraging and motivating yourself. (We can’t always rely on others to do that for us!) But in the end, we can’t forget to trust God and seek His truth in our circumstances. Let’s encourage ourselves based on who God says we are!

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God, thanks for the people of Japan and the joy of children as they do big things. Bless them and show them who You are. Also, help us to encourage ourselves with Your grace and Truth. In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Question: Have you seen any positive, funny, or heartwarming shows lately?

Tasks: Review this throwback blog post and this one, too for some good resources on the same topic!

Posted on in Fear/Don't Fake Brave, Gratitude, Life is Short, Miscellaneous, Parenting, Perseverance, Personality, Procrastination, Wisdom

If You Could Not Fail

A question popped into my mind this week while I walked down a hill to my car after work: What would you do if you knew you could not fail?

While the weather was good and the street was dry, I was thinking about how that particular path gets icy and I usually walk like a penguin in an attempt not to fall. I’m happy to report I haven’t wiped out yet!

By the time I reached the bottom of the hill, which leads into the parking lot, I had to laugh. If I knew I would not fail, or, fall, maybe I would skateboard or roller skate down the hill. Or, ski or sled depending on the weather and season!

Skater, Graffiti, Lifestyle, Athletic, Man, Skateboard

I tend to be rather cautious by nature, which usually serves me well, but occasionally this causes me to make more safe choices rather than bold ones.

I’m not surprised Lydia is like me in that. I have just learned to take it in stride and deal with fear more effectively. Thank God!

She missed out on another opportunity this week because of fear. It was basically a repeat at the gas station, as before. She wanted a treat, and I agreed if she would go in and get it herself. I gave her a few dollars and a deadline. I was pumping gas, so she had a brief few moments to decide. Well, she didn’t budge…

But, after watching the TrueGirl Miriam Bible study about courage, I gave her another chance. This time, she did it with flying colors… and realized it was way easier than she thought.

Then, we thought of the situation from God’s perspective. I had provided the money and resources for Lydia to get what she wanted. I even positioned her for success and drove her up the door! But, she had to make up her mind and get out of the car.

For me, this all was just a good heart check. God provides for us and positions us for His plan. With His presence and power, we cannot truly fail long-term, though we may fall down occasionally. But, we still have to make up our minds and obey.

Ultimately, we have to step out in faith (or skateboard or ski), making it a regular habit. If we don’t, fear will become the default.

Thankfully, God never gives up on us. He is the God of second chances!

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God, thanks for second chances and for setting us up for success. Thanks that we don’t have to give in to fear. Help us step out by faith, even when we may fail, knowing You will catch us and redirect us. In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Questions: What would you do if you knew you could not fail? Are you running on faith or fear?

Task: Stay close to the Lord so you can refill your faith and navigate fearful moments.

Posted on in Finding Grace Weekly Recap, Gratitude, Miscellaneous, Parenting

Finding Grace #317

You may have seen the acronym GRACE as God’s Riches At Christ’s Expense. Grace is also God’s unmerited favor, or God doing for us what we cannot.

I find grace overflowing with God’s love, joy, peace, blessings, mercy, power, provision, protection, and wisdom. Thank You, Jesus!

Where did I find God’s love and favor—His abundant grace—this week?!

This was a great week! God answered some prayers, showed me His blessings and reminded me to rest. I also saw the first few robins of the season. Just what I needed!

On Sunday, Lydia started a program called BioGirls with two friends. This is a local program that focuses on friendship, self-esteem, and other life skills in the pre-teen years. This includes some exercises, devotional time, and other fun activities. It will be interesting to see her grow and learn!

After that, we went out to eat at a local Italian restaurant! It was on a whim, but we had a coupon and wanted to try something new. JoJo’s is just off the highway and has been open since September. We had some delicious focaccia bread with herbed ricotta cheese. Lydia ordered chicken fettuccine alfredo and I ordered a small pizza–we each had leftovers for about four meals! We will definitely go back!

Lydia and I each had a good chiropractor appointment. We are starting to space them out now, so we don’t go back for two weeks. The doctor was very pleased with how both of us are making progress. I am feeling really good and can’t believe I waited so long to go!

Work went well, and I had a few meetings but a lighter patient load! That helped me get and stay caught up, so hopefully next week I can work on a few small projects!

At the beginning of the week, I noticed all my snow had finally melted. Then, on Tuesday we got about three more inches! It was a surprise, but not a huge deal. We just took it in stride, and I am happy to report most of it is melted again. I wonder what the poor robins thought about the weather!

This week, Lydia and I spent some quality time together. We did Week 2 of the Miriam study at True Girl ministries. We did the BioGirls exercises together (to practice for her Sunday class), and we also went clothes shopping and bought two items for Lydia. We even wore matching earrings one day and didn’t notice until that evening! I love my girl!

Today, Lydia and I did our “Saturday tasks” and then I took a much-needed nap. When I woke up, Lydia mentioned that she started a load of laundry for me. That was super thoughtful of her, and I was very appreciative. It helped me have a little time to work on other things and eventually relax, too! Thank You, Jesus!

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These are only a few examples, but God’s grace never runs out!

There’s grace in every situation—we just need to look for it. God promises if we seek Him, we will find Him (see Jeremiah 29:13)!

Posted on in Finding Grace Weekly Recap, Gratitude, Miscellaneous, Parenting

Finding Grace #315

You may have seen the acronym GRACE as God’s Riches At Christ’s Expense. Grace is also God’s unmerited favor, or God doing for us what we cannot.

I find grace overflowing with God’s love, joy, peace, blessings, mercy, power, provision, protection, and wisdom. Thank You, Jesus!

Where did I find God’s love and favor—His abundant grace—this week?!

This was a good week! Lydia and I had fun with our family in the Phoenix area, and we enjoyed being in the warm desert. We saw cactuses, palm trees, and even a pretty type of bush called a great bougainvillea (pictured above). Arizona doesn’t participate in daylight savings time, so we had a jumpstart into the rest of the week!

Lydia and I went to the chiropractor on Monday. She was adjusted for the first time ever and said, “My back feels so fresh!” 🙂 I don’t think we are 100% just yet, but definitely feeling better day by day. Thank You, Jesus!

Work went well, and I had a lot of great patients. I also had someone confirm I am right where I need to be, which feels great! Also, someone in our department volunteered to make us omelets on Friday! So yummy!

I had a fun conversation with some church ladies on Wednesday, totally unexpected but so rewarding. I am grateful for the women God has placed in my life!

On Friday, I got my taxes done and had an interesting conversation with my accountant. She was rather talkative and shared with me more than usual. It made me really thankful for how God has taken care of us, for who Dave was, and how hard he worked.

Then, yesterday evening, Lydia and I went to Scheels as well as the mall to look around. It was so nice to enjoy the beautiful weather! Lydia promised me she didn’t need her coat! We made some purchases, but it was really just fun to spend time together!

Today, Lydia and I updated a couple of our electronic devices, read books, and caught up on chores. I usually have a lot going on at home on Saturday, but I tried to take a relaxed approach to my to-do list.

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These are only a few examples, but God’s grace never runs out!

There’s grace in every situation—we just need to look for it. God promises if we seek Him, we will find Him (see Jeremiah 29:13)!

Posted on in Fear, Faith, and Moving Forward book, Fear/Don't Fake Brave, Miscellaneous, Parenting, Wisdom

On Hearing God’s Voice

Recently, Lydia asked me a really great question: “How do I know if it is my conscience speaking or God?”

Well, it’s not always an easy answer. Generally, most of us won’t hear an audible voice!

But, I told Lydia God can communicate with us in a variety of ways. He can use circumstances, subtle impressions, our pastors, podcasts, billboards, books, songs, strangers, friends, family, enemies … really, just about anything to get our attention.

In the Bible, God even used a talking donkey (Numbers 22)! It’s so funny how Balaam just answered his donkey… like it was a completely normal occurrence!

Radar, Radar Dish, Earth Station, Fuchsstadt, Reception

So, Lydia and I talked about the art of discernment, which basically means deciding between two or more good options (what is good versus what is best). It does take wisdom to see all the different angles. Often, NOT making a decision is the same as deciding against it.

There are several ways to discern between options, and it is important to seek God’s input. We can review what the Bible says on the topic at hand, and we can check our motives. God won’t ask us to go against His Word, and our conscience is from Him.

Of course, we should pray and seek wise counsel. The Holy Spirit is within us to teach us, lead us, and show us the Truth. We can also learn from people with experience beyond ours. These may include a godly family member, a pastor or counselor, or a trustworthy friend. Is there someone who has a history of making good, wise decisions that turn out well?

We can make a pros-and-cons list, too. Sometimes there are good reasons for and against a certain option. But, seeing the ideas on paper helps us decide what the most important factors are. Is there one that is time-sensitive or weighs more heavily than the others? 

Sound, Wave, Audio, Frequency, Spectrum

I love how we can look back to see the trail of God’s faithfulness over time. He may decide to do something completely new, but there may be a pattern we can learn from as we move forward. Trust God to equip you and put you in the right place at the right time!

Of note, it is easier to hear from God if we are in the habit of listening to Him. Let’s tune our spiritual eyes and ears to Him, so we can see Him at work around us and hear His song (Zephaniah 3:17).

God also speaks to those who make the effort to know Him and seek Him out. Then, we are more likely to honor Him as we listen and obey.

Ultimately, PEACE is the final indicator for whether or not to do something. If you don’t have peace, then that’s your answer… don’t do it. Sometimes, there is peace in the presence of fear (that’s courage). Do it afraid!

When the way seems impossible and we want to give up, we have to choose faith over fear. That’s why good decisions often take time. Rushing means our emotions may still be all over the place.

For me, the sense of desperation is usually a red flag. So, it is good to be calm and clear-headed before making a decision. Especially if there is a lot at stake! 

Finally, we have to accept responsibility for our decisions and live with the consequences. Sometimes, there is an obvious win-win and sometimes we just have to make the best decision we can. Consider disconnecting from all the ‘noise’ of music, television, and social media so you can hear God more clearly.

We may not have all the answers or know all the details, but we can always take the first step, trusting God will redirect us and make our path clear (Proverbs 3:5-6). If we’re open to what He wants in our lives, He will make sure we know what that is!

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God, thanks for filling us with the mind of Christ! We don’t have to be confused or concerned. You will tell us what we need to know and when. Help us to listen, Lord. In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Questions: What’s your experience in listening for God’s voice? Is it easy for you to understand what He is saying? How can you get better at this?

Tasks: Read Psalm 29:3-5 and Jeremiah 33:3. Next time you are faced with a big decision, try some of the ideas above to help you discern what to do! Remember to follow the way of peace!

Posted on in Fear/Don't Fake Brave, Finding Grace Weekly Recap, Gratitude, Miscellaneous, Parenting, Perseverance, Prayer

Finding Grace #312

You may have seen the acronym GRACE as God’s Riches At Christ’s Expense. Grace is also God’s unmerited favor, or God doing for us what we cannot.

I find grace overflowing with God’s love, joy, peace, blessings, mercy, power, provision, protection, and wisdom. Thank You, Jesus!

Bridge, Wooden, Winter, Snow, Mountains, Poland, Wood

Where did I find God’s love and favor—His abundant grace—this week?!

Overall, this was another good week, though it was sad and heavy at times due to foreign events in Ukraine. I was leaving a store yesterday afternoon thinking about traffic and ‘all’ I had to do. But, then the thought occurred to me, “I am not getting bombed and I am not fearing for my safety. I’m fine.” I’m keeping Ukraine in prayer.

This week, I decided to forgo a doctor’s appointment for my toe because it is pretty close to healed. I don’t know if there’s anything else that can be done for it, so I canceled the appointment. It turned out to be a good idea because it was a busy work week and I was able to use that time for charting.

I enjoyed the ladies’ group at church and was able to connect with a new widow friend. It is a tough road to walk, but I hope to encourage her as best I can.

I talked with a friend about this week’s blog post on bravery. We discussed some kid-friendly resources, so I ordered a few workbooks for Lydia and me to try! I hope to review them for you soon!

This morning, I was on-call for work but did not get called in. I got up early and was ready to go, but I am glad I was able to relax. Later, Lydia was invited over to a friend’s house, so I had the afternoon and early evening to myself!

Early in the week, we had off for a blizzardy President’s Day. Then, Lydia was off due to the same blizzard on Tuesday. It was cold early on, but today, it was finally in the 20s or so above zero! It was so pretty and felt great!

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These are only a few examples, but God’s grace never runs out!

There’s grace in every situation—we just need to look for it. God promises if we seek Him, we will find Him (see Jeremiah 29:13)!

Posted on in Being Gracious, Books and Movies I Like, Fear/Don't Fake Brave, Kindness, Miscellaneous, Parenting, Perseverance, Personality, Wisdom

Brave, Smart, or Kind

Do you ever try to talk yourself out of decisions? Or is that just me?

Last week, I had said I would attend an event but was on the fence about actually doing so. Even though I wanted to go, I kind of didn’t want to go. Sometimes it’s an introvert thing and sometimes it is a fear thing… honestly, it may be both.

I was raised to honor commitments, but even so, I was trying to think of other things to do! It’s cold. It’s dark. I’m tired. I’m busy and want a break. I need to, I should…

Most of these were excuses, which should have been my first clue. Though, a couple of possible solutions did pop into my head. One, I could have practiced for the next day’s presentation at work; that would have been smart. And, two, I could have checked in on a friend who is a new widow and single mom; that would have been kind.

Sensing a teachable moment, I asked Lydia, “Should I do something brave, smart, or kind?” And then, I told her about these three ideas also explaining that all of them were good options.

It was a good, better, best type of moment. There wasn’t an obviously wrong answer.

Path, Feet, Shoes, Road Surface, Direction, Arrow

I loved Lydia’s response: “I think you should do the brave thing and go. You can probably practice later, and maybe you could show your friend kindness in some other way. But this is the only chance to be brave.”

We discussed it further and we agreed. I didn’t really need to practice much for my presentation since it is a very familiar nutrition topic. Often, I joke that I could do that while asleep! I talk about it more or less every day, so I know it inside and out.

And, while I didn’t tell Lydia this, I had already reached out to my widow friend. I wanted to be open in case God had our paths cross that night and she wanted to talk. But, I also wanted to give her some space since she has been overwhelmed. Of course, there is a balance and the key is listening to the Holy Spirit’s timing. He did not have our paths cross that night.

Basically, since I was at risk of chickening out, I knew I needed to do the brave thing and show up. Fear is so subtle isn’t it?! Faith is the only way forward!

I can do difficult things, and I am so glad I did. I had a great time and shared a lot of laughter with some really sweet ladies. If I had chosen an option other than bravery, I might have missed an opportunity to meet new friends. Or, it might be even more difficult or awkward the next time. The first step is always the hardest!

Be, Brave, Svg, Motivation, Courage

Then, a few days later, Lydia chickened out several times all within the same day.

For example, I asked her to stand in a separate grocery line and make a purchase (on her own, while I was nearby), but she didn’t. In another instance, she completely missed out on a fun reward because she stalled and didn’t get out the door in time. Fear had her stuck in her tracks. 

When we discussed it, she said, “I’m just afraid of everything!” This stood out to me because it is uncharacteristic of how she normally acts… and I can totally relate.

In fact, I was able to share a little of my story and my fight against fear. Even as a young child, I was afraid. Fear was always an undercurrent, but difficult for me to fully identify and deal with. So, it was interesting how I could recognize the lies and reframe them for Lydia.

I explained that Jesus set us free from fear, and now we don’t have to be afraid. Fear is normal, but we don’t have to dwell on it or stay in that mindset. We have to challenge our fears in order to keep moving forward!

It’s as if we are sitting in a jail cell feeling sorry for ourselves when the key is in the door standing wide open. I’m sure God is like, “Hello!!! I already did the difficult work! All you have to do is walk out and be free!”

Jesus is so much more than our ‘get-out-of-jail-free’ card.

Fearful events happen all around us. We can’t always get away from every obstacle. But, over and over in the Bible, God commands us, “Do not be afraid.” So, it seems we are responsible for not giving in to fear and staying stuck. God always provides a way to move forward, if we are willing to be brave.

There are several ways we can combat fear. We can pray for help, quote a Bible verse, ask a friend to come with us… but ultimately, we need to show up and do the difficult thing anyway. We won’t always get it right the first time, but as long as we stand in faith, we win!

Often, we have to challenge ourselves with little scary tasks so we are prepared when the big ones come! Thus, Lydia and I decided to work toward this together and keep each other accountable. I will be presenting small ongoing weekly challenges to build her up for the future. I’m still sorting out what that looks like!

I’m her mom, yes, but I know all too well what happens when we give in to fear. Over time, it becomes a stronghold and I will not allow that on my watch!

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God, thank You for setting us free from fear so we can walk in Your grace and Truth. We praise You because we don’t have to be afraid!! Open our eyes to the lies we believe so we may challenge them and keep moving forward. We have Victory! In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Questions: How have you been brave, smart, or kind this week? Has it been easy or a challenge? What will you do differently next time?

Tasks: Challenge your fears, and do it afraid! Watch The Pilgrim’s Progress, which is based on the classic story by John Bunyan. It highlights several of the lies we believe in our Christian walk.