This past Monday marked four years since Dave died, after he battled cancer for 364 days. On occasion, I find myself pausing to think about it all. It still seems unreal at times. But most days, I am simply glad for all God has done in our lives since then.
Sometimes we want to rush through our pain—to get through it as fast as possible—to stop the hurting and find relief. But healing takes time. So, I am grateful for Jesus’ healing touch these last four years. He has given us space and time to heal, learn, and grow.
Indeed, these last four years, God has ordered our steps and reordered our lives in ways only He can. I usually pray about my agenda for each day. But on Monday, I specifically asked the Lord to direct my steps. Like usual, my schedule had many possibilities for the day… but I also wanted to conserve my emotional energy!
I could see God at work when my neighbor took Lydia to school with her son. So, I was able to run an important errand before work. At work, it was good to talk a little but also keep my mind on other things. Later in the day, we decided to hangout with our friends for an impromptu playdate. The kids played water games and the moms chatted!
Earlier, Lydia had suggested we eat strawberries and ice cream in Dave’s honor. (Dave always loved strawberries!) I had planned to do something with Lydia along those lines, but didn’t have any specific plans. So on a whim, I offered to share our strawberries and ice cream with our friends outside. The timing worked out so much better than I could have imagined. It’s hard to beat ice cream with friends on a hot day!
It’s always good to bless others, and our friends were so gracious. It was just what I needed, but nothing I could have planned. Praise God!!
Lately, I’ve been enjoying the song “Even If” by Mercy Me. It captures the essence of our cancer journey, my previous struggles with fear, and our determination to stand in faith. Here’s a snippet of the song… (I put the link at the end of this post if you want to listen.)
You’ve been faithful
You’ve been good
All of my days
Jesus, I will cling to You
Come what may
‘Cause I know You’re able
I know You canI know You’re able
And I know You can
Save through the fire
With Your mighty hand
But even if You don’t
My hope is You alone
Yes, God is more than able to save the day. We pray and do everything we can, but in all things, He has the final say. And that’s okay. I can trust Him to do what is best for me, because He has promised to do so. Even if I don’t understand.
God doesn’t expect us to do it alone—He only asks us to trust Him. It does take faith, yet the Lord has an impeccable track record. His love never fails! I have experienced His sweet, unfailing love firsthand!
These days, I find much comfort in God’s promises. His promises reflect His loving character and awesome power. The Bible is full of them but the ones I cling to most are the promises of God’s presence, His peace, His plan, and His provision. For me, these are like pillars, giving structure to His other promises.
God has promised never to leave nor forsake me. Sadly, people often come and go. Plans will change. Life has many twists and turns, ups and downs. But through it all, Jesus is never far away or out of touch. I can come directly to Him…because He promised.
God has promised me inner peace. In fact, Jesus said He IS my peace. I don’t have to live in fear or worry, or deal with unpredictable emotional roller coasters. I can give Him my cares, knowing He is cares deeply for me. I can rest in His love…because He promised.
God has promised good to me. He didn’t say it would be easy or that I would have all the answers…but He did promise to work it all out in my favor eventually. If a situation is not good, then God’s not done yet. I can trust Him…because He promised.
God has promised to provide for me. God has generously provided me with a job, but His provision goes beyond covering my finances, housing, bills, or food. He has given me enough to share with others as needed. I also have a wonderful family and lots of friends. Jesus has given me grace and space to grieve. I can rely on Him…because He promised.
Dear friend, my situation (and yours) is not a surprise to God. It may not make sense right now….it may seem impossible. But with Jesus, all things are possible. He’s got this!
We do not often know when or how it will all work out, but the Lord is faithful. He does not waver. He always does what He says He will do. All of God’s promises are YES in Christ Jesus! In Him, we have the AMEN and give Him the glory (see 2 Corinthians 1:19-20).
Sure, waiting is a challenge. But hold on. A promise is a promise.
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Heavenly Father, You are good and faithful. Thanks for Your promises. I choose to trust You, Jesus. Give me strength to stand firm. In Your Name, Amen
Question: What Bible verse or promise speaks to you right now?
Task: Listen to Even If, by MercyMe. Trust in Jesus!
Dave would be so proud of all that you’ve accomplished since his death. And, I love seeing little bits of him resurface through Lydia.
Thank you, Livi!